1 00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:08,000 You. Taxi. 2 00:01:09,579 --> 00:01:10,680 - Scottie. - Ah. 3 00:01:12,219 --> 00:01:12,659 What? 4 00:01:13,019 --> 00:01:14,319 Where can I reach you at Vegas? 5 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:15,859 I'll call you. 6 00:01:16,200 --> 00:01:17,920 Hey, listen, stay on top of the Hillary thing, will you? 7 00:01:18,219 --> 00:01:19,519 I've got a client list right here. 8 00:01:19,799 --> 00:01:21,019 I'll see you in a couple of days. 9 00:01:22,500 --> 00:01:23,680 New York Hospital. 10 00:01:23,900 --> 00:01:26,840 - Hey, I thought you were going to Vegas. - I lied. 11 00:03:38,900 --> 00:03:40,840 - Eighth floor. - Eighth floor. 12 00:04:11,420 --> 00:04:12,819 Hold it a minute, everybody. 13 00:04:13,139 --> 00:04:14,479 I got this great idea. 14 00:04:14,780 --> 00:04:16,180 Let's all meet a year from today. 15 00:04:20,819 --> 00:04:22,060 Man, that got nothing. 16 00:04:30,079 --> 00:04:32,800 Dr. Bexley, please. Dr. Bexley. 17 00:04:40,079 --> 00:04:42,800 Dr. Bexley, please. Dr. Bexley. 18 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:48,800 Bingo. 19 00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:56,600 Dr. Cheymarco. Dr. Lopez. 20 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:02,600 - Morning, doctor. - Morning, nurse. 21 00:05:03,180 --> 00:05:05,620 Morning, my dear. Time for your physical. 23 00:05:05,620 --> 00:05:07,740 - Are you my doctor? - No, I'm Dr. Cronkite. 00:05:07,820 --> 00:05:10,740 Your doctor wanted a second opinion just to make sure. 24 00:05:13,360 --> 00:05:16,779 - Shouldn't those go in your ears? - No, that just confuses me. 25 00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:19,060 Actually, I'm here to do the internal. 26 00:05:19,199 --> 00:05:22,540 Why would I need an internal? I just had an appendectomy. 27 00:05:22,659 --> 00:05:24,500 Yeah, but when I play doctor, I play doctor. 28 00:05:26,000 --> 00:05:30,259 - Now, my name is Scott Templeton, my dear. I am a desperately lonely man. 29 00:05:30,500 --> 00:05:31,959 - And I am Sally Hames. - Hi. 30 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:34,259 - And I just had my appendix out. - Oh. 31 00:05:35,000 --> 00:05:40,000 - What are you in for? - Tests, good old tests. 00:05:40,100 --> 00:05:41,259 Well, when you're an older person, Sally, 00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:45,259 you have to be checked out now and then for dry rot. And termites. 32 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:47,300 General signs of deterioration. 33 00:05:48,160 --> 00:05:49,899 You don't look like an older person. 34 00:05:50,079 --> 00:05:51,579 And you certainly don't act like one. 35 00:05:51,680 --> 00:05:52,300 Oh, thank you. 36 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:54,060 I'll be 53 in three months. 37 00:05:54,199 --> 00:05:55,480 You managed to look so young. 38 00:05:55,860 --> 00:05:57,180 That is very simple, you see. 39 00:05:57,240 --> 00:05:58,560 I treat my body like a temple. 40 00:05:59,220 --> 00:06:02,459 I never put anything or any one not organically grown in my mouth. 41 00:06:04,060 --> 00:06:05,620 - Scottie. - Ah? 42 00:06:05,880 --> 00:06:06,779 We're ready to see you now. 43 00:06:08,259 --> 00:06:10,019 You hold that thought, will you, my pet? 44 00:06:11,019 --> 00:06:12,560 Honest to God, Gladys, 45 00:06:12,579 --> 00:06:14,180 you gotta pull yourself together, girl. 46 00:06:14,399 --> 00:06:16,720 I was just beginning to get somewhere with that cute little thing. 47 00:06:17,500 --> 00:06:20,199 We're not gonna learn to control that insane jealousy you've done. 48 00:06:20,300 --> 00:06:21,060 Hey, how's your ankle? 49 00:06:21,319 --> 00:06:22,600 Still broken, Scottie. 50 00:06:22,680 --> 00:06:23,100 I see. 51 00:06:26,500 --> 00:06:28,000 - Doctor. - Thank you. 52 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:31,399 Those are very serious. 53 00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:49,000 Thanks. This is funny. 54 00:07:54,579 --> 00:07:55,120 Hi. 55 00:07:55,660 --> 00:07:56,180 Taxi. 56 00:08:03,579 --> 00:08:04,740 21, please. 57 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:05,459 It's an emergency. 58 00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:06,220 Emergency? 59 00:08:06,899 --> 00:08:09,699 Yeah, we have to get the taste of the hospital food out of our mouths. 60 00:08:10,939 --> 00:08:12,680 Unless, of course, you have a better idea. 61 00:08:13,459 --> 00:08:14,519 Not. 00:08:47,459 --> 00:08:48,519 You write that yourself? 62 00:08:48,820 --> 00:08:49,659 Huh? Yeah. 63 00:08:50,019 --> 00:08:51,899 I... Oh, boy, that's all wrong. 64 00:08:52,220 --> 00:08:54,500 You're supposed to be standing there looking funny but adorable 64 00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:57,200 in a pair of my pajamas that are much too big for you. 65 00:08:57,480 --> 00:08:59,919 And then my boyfriend comes in and sees me in your pajamas 00:09:00,180 --> 00:09:01,519 and thinks we've been to bed together. 66 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:04,360 Why didn't we go to bed together? 67 00:09:04,899 --> 00:09:09,279 Well, I can answer that word. It's the age difference. You're too old for me. 70 00:09:09,539 --> 00:09:11,600 Why don't you get that cute body into the kitchen, huh, 71 00:09:11,820 --> 00:09:12,980 and get us both some coffee? It's all ready. 72 00:09:13,159 --> 00:09:14,419 You know, you were really quite weird. 73 00:09:14,860 --> 00:09:15,980 I mean, you turned the hell out of me, 74 00:09:16,019 --> 00:09:18,360 and then you lured me back to your place in the... 75 00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:22,600 I've seen luring in my time. Last night, there was absolutely no luring. 76 00:09:23,320 --> 00:09:27,000 Maybe a little leering, but no luring. Are you sure you're not an actress? 76 00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,000 - Why? - The way you're avoiding the kitchen. 00:09:29,320 --> 00:09:31,000 See, I find you can only get breakfast out of an actress 00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:33,000 if you put tape marks on the kitchen floor. 77 00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:41,399 What kind of modeling do you do, anyway? Fashion? Photographic? 00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:43,799 - Nude? - Make me an offer. 00:09:44,000 --> 00:09:46,799 Mostly, I hand out balloons at conventions. 78 00:09:49,580 --> 00:09:50,779 That's a pretty song. 79 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:51,940 Oh, thank you. 80 00:09:52,419 --> 00:09:53,919 Maybe someday I'll get an ending for him. 81 00:09:53,980 --> 00:09:55,019 How long have you been working on it? 82 00:09:55,259 --> 00:09:56,279 Ew, 20 years. 83 00:09:56,740 --> 00:09:57,460 What do you call it? 84 00:09:57,720 --> 00:09:59,059 Lack of discipline. What else? 85 00:10:00,580 --> 00:10:02,080 I couldn't find any orange juice. 86 00:10:02,279 --> 00:10:03,820 Oh, well, that's probably behind the bar, I love. 87 00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:07,379 The bar? Oh, yeah, the bottom shelf on the right of books there. 88 00:10:07,460 --> 00:10:09,059 You pull the fourth book out from the left. 89 00:10:09,259 --> 00:10:09,639 The book? 90 00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:10,919 Yeah, just pull it out. 91 00:10:10,980 --> 00:10:13,480 You'll find yourself in the middle of Lost Weekend. Give it a yank. 93 00:10:13,960 --> 00:10:14,639 Atta girl. 94 00:10:16,139 --> 00:10:17,960 Hey, that is terrific. 95 00:10:18,279 --> 00:10:18,759 Oh, yeah. 96 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:25,620 You have a terrific place. 97 00:10:25,759 --> 00:10:26,379 Well, thank you. 98 00:10:26,559 --> 00:10:27,220 Is that your son? 99 00:10:27,659 --> 00:10:29,580 Where? Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's him. 100 00:10:30,580 --> 00:10:31,500 He took that himself. 101 00:10:33,379 --> 00:10:34,740 He always was good with a camera. 102 00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:37,559 Why did you stop writing movies? 103 00:10:37,700 --> 00:10:37,919 Huh? 104 00:10:38,159 --> 00:10:39,179 Didn't you like being a writer? 105 00:10:39,519 --> 00:10:41,139 Oh, hell, I loved being a writer. 106 00:10:41,779 --> 00:10:42,840 I just hated writing. 107 00:10:43,039 --> 00:10:43,460 How come? 108 00:10:43,799 --> 00:10:47,000 Well, for one thing, you have to be in a room all alone. I like to mix. 00:10:47,799 --> 00:10:50,000 Geez, I really should have been a head waiter. 00:10:50,799 --> 00:10:52,700 What do you do now? 00:10:52,799 --> 00:10:57,100 I'm a Broadway press agent. If you want to get fancy, that means I'm in public relations. 00:10:57,799 --> 00:11:03,100 - Well, what's it like being in public relations? - Actually, it's a lot like being a head waiter. 00:11:16,799 --> 00:11:22,100 Hey, relax. Don't be nervous. How bad can it be? 00:11:22,799 --> 00:11:26,100 - It's been three years. - So? 109 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:31,000 Look, as you know, at the best of times, I'm not very good at... 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:36,000 - Making contact? - Making contact, that's good. 110 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:41,000 It's just that when I'm around him, I seem to turn into a different person. 00:11:41,000 --> 00:11:43,000 - Who? - Beats me. 112 00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:45,259 It sure isn't me. 113 00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:56,480 Now, remember, I am available for parties, 114 00:11:56,659 --> 00:11:58,679 afternoon teas, conversation, or almost anything. 00:11:58,859 --> 00:12:01,279 - There's no need to rush off, you know. - I got an audition. 116 00:12:01,419 --> 00:12:02,539 I want to thank you. 117 00:12:02,580 --> 00:12:04,080 I laughed so hard my stitches hurt. 118 00:12:04,259 --> 00:12:05,120 Well, then give me a kiss. 119 00:12:05,860 --> 00:12:07,220 Right here. That's all. 121 00:12:09,100 --> 00:12:12,820 I didn't think a big city girl like you was going to fall for an old gag like that. 122 00:12:12,879 --> 00:12:15,240 - I didn't. - Well, I didn't think you did. 124 00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:16,559 I'll be in touch. 125 00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:41,000 Come on in, Jud. The door's open, son. 126 00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:50,000 Jud, how... 127 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:57,440 Of all the gin mills in all the towns in all the world, she has to fall into mine. Maggie. 00:12:57,500 --> 00:13:00,040 Hi, Scottie. Jud just getting his stuff out of the taxi. 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,840 Don't just stay in there looking up my skirt. Come up here and give me a kiss. 00:13:02,900 --> 00:13:05,440 - Why don't you come down here? - Well, this is closer to the bedroom. 128 00:13:05,580 --> 00:13:07,539 I thought maybe we'd have a little slap and tickle before the kid comes in 00:13:07,680 --> 00:13:09,139 and puts a damper on everything. 129 00:13:09,299 --> 00:13:10,760 - Could you make that retroactive? - Oh, yeah. 131 00:13:10,919 --> 00:13:11,799 I'll meet you halfway. 132 00:13:11,980 --> 00:13:13,240 Well, you got it. 133 00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:14,860 You look marvelous. 134 00:13:15,820 --> 00:13:17,220 How's that chap you live with treating you? 135 00:13:17,340 --> 00:13:19,679 That chap I live with has just been made a full professor. 136 00:13:19,879 --> 00:13:20,980 He treats me very well. 137 00:13:21,019 --> 00:13:22,059 I'm very happy for you, though. 138 00:13:22,299 --> 00:13:22,980 I know you are. 139 00:13:23,279 --> 00:13:25,279 - It's one of your better qualities. - It may be the only one. 140 00:13:25,419 --> 00:13:26,399 What are you doing in New York? 141 00:13:26,539 --> 00:13:28,240 Came to see Dad. He's in a nursing home. 143 00:13:34,620 --> 00:13:36,419 How long you been in the Teamsters Union, son? 144 00:13:38,019 --> 00:13:38,340 What? 145 00:13:39,159 --> 00:13:39,799 He missed it. 146 00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,759 God damn it. Just sort of slid...Oh, the hell with it. 148 00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:42,659 How are you, son? 149 00:13:43,039 --> 00:13:44,360 Fine. Just fine. 151 00:13:44,399 --> 00:13:46,019 - Good to see you, Dad. - What the hell is this? 152 00:13:46,319 --> 00:13:49,060 Are we in a Chevrolet dealer's convention? It's a nice doing business with you, Sam. 155 00:13:49,340 --> 00:13:52,379 Come on and give your old man a sloppy bear hug like a proper son. 156 00:13:52,439 --> 00:13:53,580 Ah, that a boy. 157 00:13:54,539 --> 00:13:57,720 - Have you told him yet? - Huh? What? Tell me what? 159 00:13:57,840 --> 00:14:00,919 A friend of Don has offered Jud a teaching assistant job this summer. 160 00:14:01,020 --> 00:14:02,179 Where? 161 00:14:02,539 --> 00:14:03,139 Berkeley. 162 00:14:03,319 --> 00:14:05,760 It'll help with the tuition and be great experience. 00:14:06,219 --> 00:14:07,460 Experience for what? 163 00:14:07,659 --> 00:14:12,259 - Teaching. I've decided that I want to teach. - You want to teach? 00:14:12,659 --> 00:14:17,759 - Why this sudden urge to become Mr. Chips? - Yes. 00:14:17,959 --> 00:14:21,459 - Well, let me try to answer that question. - It's not a press conference, kid. 00:14:21,659 --> 00:14:26,259 - Just relax. - I decided that if I got a PhD in history, 00:14:26,659 --> 00:14:28,259 it would give me a number of options. 164 00:14:28,879 --> 00:14:33,659 I could teach or I could use my writing ability to make a contribution as a social historian. 165 00:14:34,320 --> 00:14:36,379 I applied to Berkeley and was accepted for the fall. 166 00:14:36,860 --> 00:14:39,299 My feeling is, naturally, it is the correct move. 167 00:14:39,779 --> 00:14:42,700 And then when this summer job came up, I really couldn't afford to pass it by. 168 00:14:42,960 --> 00:14:44,299 When does the job start? 169 00:14:44,779 --> 00:14:48,600 They wanted me immediately, but I managed to put them off for a week 00:14:48,779 --> 00:14:50,600 - so that I could visit you. - What the hell do you mean? 00:14:50,779 --> 00:14:53,000 - You're only gonna be here a week? - That's okay with you. 00:14:53,779 --> 00:14:56,700 Okay with me? Well, I just wish you'd consulted me. 00:14:56,779 --> 00:14:58,000 - I would have, but... 00:14:58,779 --> 00:15:02,000 Well, I knew it wouldn't make much difference to you one way or the other. 170 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:09,659 You know, we always did kid around a lot, but I would like to ask one serious question. 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,659 Who's his father? Who, the Japanese gardener? 00:15:13,300 --> 00:15:16,659 You realize that there's not one damn thing about me that's anything like him? 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:21,659 It was the pool man, the one with the tight jeans and the tattoo. 00:15:22,000 --> 00:15:27,659 That kid's 20 years old. He dresses like he's out of a Chekhov play. Tell me something. 00:15:27,900 --> 00:15:29,759 Is his face always that clenched? 00:15:30,050 --> 00:15:32,659 Jud's a very serious person, always has been. 00:15:32,900 --> 00:15:36,659 Oh, not always. Do you remember when I used to wear that crazy chicken outfit? 00:15:36,900 --> 00:15:39,659 You remember the costume I brought home from the studio? The wah, wah, wah. 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:42,659 Hell, he used to roll around the floor, roaring with laughter. 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:45,659 Scottie, he was eight years old then. 171 00:15:45,740 --> 00:15:48,259 All I know is I want him to stay here, damn it. 172 00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:50,820 But this opportunity is very important to him. 173 00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:54,179 Oh, God, it's important to me that he stays here. 174 00:15:55,179 --> 00:15:55,620 Why? 175 00:15:56,539 --> 00:15:56,980 Because. 176 00:15:58,820 --> 00:16:06,139 I want him to get to know me. You know, and I want to get to know... 00:16:06,820 --> 00:16:10,139 What do you want, a couple of choruses of sunrise, sunset? 177 00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:13,019 There is something you're not telling me. 178 00:16:13,860 --> 00:16:15,159 Why do you say that? 179 00:16:15,879 --> 00:16:19,039 Well, you could always make me laugh, but you could never lie to me. 180 00:16:20,639 --> 00:16:21,480 I got you right. 181 00:16:21,679 --> 00:16:22,519 - Yeah. - Yeah. 183 00:16:23,340 --> 00:16:25,719 I remember when I showed up for the property settlement in an old suit 00:16:25,940 --> 00:16:27,019 with a tin cup full of pencils. 184 00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:28,080 You were the only one who laughed. 185 00:16:28,539 --> 00:16:30,100 It's a shame that Jud didn't. 186 00:16:34,539 --> 00:16:36,639 I spent a little time in the hospital, Maggie. 187 00:16:36,879 --> 00:16:39,480 It turns out I'm in less than perfect health. 188 00:16:42,419 --> 00:16:43,399 How imperfect? 189 00:16:45,419 --> 00:16:49,320 Well, I'll tell you, when they advise you to get your affairs in order, 190 00:16:49,720 --> 00:16:52,559 you tend to think they're posting a closing notice. 191 00:16:54,580 --> 00:16:56,740 It's some kind of a blood disorder, Maggie. 192 00:16:56,879 --> 00:17:01,179 God, I don't... Maybe after all of the abuse I've heaped on, it's finally turning on me. 193 00:17:02,460 --> 00:17:04,720 Oh, Goddamn, I knew it. Now, don't do that. 195 00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:08,420 Will you please? I never would have burdened you with this, so help me. 197 00:17:08,660 --> 00:17:11,519 It's just that, Jud, here, take it easy. 198 00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:12,299 Are you all right? 199 00:17:12,559 --> 00:17:13,539 Oh, God. 200 00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:16,700 Is there any possibility of a mistake? 201 00:17:16,940 --> 00:17:17,220 What? 202 00:17:17,519 --> 00:17:19,019 No, there's no mistake. 203 00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:20,819 And no cure. 204 00:17:21,240 --> 00:17:21,660 Whee! 205 00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:24,700 You know the damnedest thing? 206 00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:26,559 It was right out of the old movies. 207 00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:28,720 I found myself saying all of those lines. 208 00:17:29,259 --> 00:17:30,500 How long have I got, Doc? 209 00:17:31,039 --> 00:17:33,779 I'm not sure. I think I even said give it to me straight. 211 00:17:34,039 --> 00:17:36,880 Well, I always said Warner Brothers has a hell of a lot to answer for. 212 00:17:37,779 --> 00:17:40,819 Scottie, when are you going to stop using the whole world as a straight man? 213 00:17:41,079 --> 00:17:44,960 Will you believe me? It's a case of no ass to kick and no heart to appeal to. 215 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:47,680 Now, look, off the subject, 216 00:17:47,799 --> 00:17:50,480 all right, I never, ever would have mentioned it except for Jud. 217 00:17:52,920 --> 00:17:54,900 Well, I can understand now why you want him to stay. 218 00:17:55,460 --> 00:17:59,640 That's not purely selfish, you know, I tell you, the boy worries me. 221 00:17:59,779 --> 00:18:01,359 Hell, he's still the same, dear. 222 00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:04,519 My God, there's no zest for life. 223 00:18:04,980 --> 00:18:07,000 I mean, there's no joy. There's no... 224 00:18:08,119 --> 00:18:10,140 Anyway, I've been thinking now. 225 00:18:10,220 --> 00:18:13,960 I can't leave him any money. I think we both know that. 226 00:18:15,099 --> 00:18:17,660 I can hardly leave that kid any childhood memories. 227 00:18:18,759 --> 00:18:23,539 Anyway, I realize that there's only one thing in my entire life 00:18:23,759 --> 00:18:26,539 that I've ever done really well, and that's just have fun. 228 00:18:27,059 --> 00:18:29,900 Right? Okay, if I could teach him that, it would be something, wouldn't it? 229 00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:32,259 Only I don't know how the hell to do it. 230 00:18:33,059 --> 00:18:35,779 All I know is this. I need time to take a shot at it. 231 00:18:35,839 --> 00:18:38,619 - If he... - Why don't you tell him the truth? 232 00:18:38,880 --> 00:18:40,700 Huh? Well, oh, my God, I'd never do that. 233 00:18:40,839 --> 00:18:41,380 Why not? 234 00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:42,819 It would depress the hell out of him. 235 00:18:43,420 --> 00:18:45,680 Maybe it would depress him. 236 00:18:47,519 --> 00:18:51,640 - Oh, God, Maggie, could you get him to... - I'll talk to him. 237 00:19:02,119 --> 00:19:02,920 Dammit, Maggie. 238 00:19:04,759 --> 00:19:10,079 - Why did we ever call it quits? - Think hard. I'll come back to you. 00:19:10,759 --> 00:19:14,079 I've been thinking, love. I keep coming up blank. 00:19:14,759 --> 00:19:17,079 You didn't think you had talent. I did. 00:19:17,759 --> 00:19:23,079 - Oh, that. I always found that very touchy. - No, you didn't. You found it annoying. 239 00:19:28,059 --> 00:19:29,059 It is annoying. 240 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,839 He wants you to stay longer, Jud. 241 00:19:47,359 --> 00:19:48,640 Why? 242 00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:51,980 Is that such a surprise? 243 00:19:54,339 --> 00:19:56,000 Why didn't he ask me? 244 00:19:57,200 --> 00:19:59,779 Well, maybe he's shy with you, huh? 245 00:20:03,180 --> 00:20:05,759 Maybe it's time you two try a fresh start. 246 00:20:12,359 --> 00:20:14,579 Okay. I'll stay. 247 00:20:14,940 --> 00:20:19,859 - Well, that was easy. - Easy for you. 248 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,859 - It's all set. - Oh, what did you tell him? 00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:41,359 - Scottie, you are his father. - Yeah, well, I don't know about that. 00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:44,359 - When's your plane leave, love? - Tomorrow morning. 249 00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:50,480 - Hey, is there anything I can do to help? - Yeah. 251 00:20:50,579 --> 00:20:52,000 Come on back and have dinner with me, can you? 252 00:20:52,660 --> 00:20:54,560 - I want to look at your funny face some more. - Okay. 254 00:20:54,859 --> 00:20:56,940 - See you later. - Yeah. 256 00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:01,759 Hot damn. 256 00:21:21,640 --> 00:21:22,759 - Hello. - Hey, Jud. 258 00:21:23,420 --> 00:21:27,240 Listen, I'm sorry, you know, about screwing up your summer plans, 259 00:21:27,339 --> 00:21:30,019 but I just want you to know I appreciate you spending time with your old man. 260 00:21:30,380 --> 00:21:30,640 Okay? 261 00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:31,519 Yes. 262 00:21:32,039 --> 00:21:34,700 Well, I'm very flattered. 263 00:21:35,500 --> 00:21:36,339 You're flattered? 264 00:21:37,940 --> 00:21:42,160 Yeah, I mean, well, I'm sure I can find something to do. 265 00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:46,380 Whoopi. Listen, it's not going to be a total loss. 266 00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:49,240 I know a girl who has been crouched in the sprint position 00:21:49,420 --> 00:21:51,240 just waiting for you to get into town, kid. 267 00:21:52,220 --> 00:21:53,480 Why would she want to meet me? 268 00:21:54,160 --> 00:21:57,240 I told her you were often mistaken for John Travolta. 269 00:21:57,900 --> 00:21:59,940 And what am I supposed to do when she sees me? 270 00:22:00,359 --> 00:22:01,799 Tell her you had a bad flight. 272 00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:04,519 Come on. 273 00:22:10,079 --> 00:22:12,880 Listen, kid, have you ever stayed at home with girls, huh? 274 00:22:12,980 --> 00:22:17,640 Who got you your very first date when you were, what were you, about 16 or something? 275 00:22:17,819 --> 00:22:18,160 Remember? 276 00:22:18,579 --> 00:22:20,079 Yeah, yeah, a little ballet dancer. 277 00:22:20,619 --> 00:22:22,179 - Since you brought it up. - Yeah. 278 00:22:22,380 --> 00:22:25,839 When I got back to Canada, I found out she had given me a dose of VD. 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:30,039 - You're kidding. Why didn't you tell me? - The damage was done. 00:22:30,180 --> 00:22:33,039 I mean, it was a little late to do anything to prevent it. 00:22:33,180 --> 00:22:35,039 Maybe for you. 00:22:36,180 --> 00:22:38,039 Will you go along with me this time, please? 00:22:38,180 --> 00:22:39,739 - This girl is - Dad. 00:22:39,880 --> 00:22:41,739 - just to... - I like to make my own friends. 00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:43,039 Thank you. 00:22:43,280 --> 00:22:46,839 Anyway, I want to use my time here to get some work done. 279 00:22:47,020 --> 00:22:53,599 Oh, yeah, with the, uh... Whatever happened to that girlfriend of yours in Pennsylvania. 280 00:22:54,559 --> 00:22:55,160 What girl? 281 00:22:55,579 --> 00:22:58,279 What do you... You're supposed to say eerie, and then I say, uh... 281 00:22:58,579 --> 00:23:00,279 Oh, I did think she was a little weird. 282 00:23:00,660 --> 00:23:03,299 You remember that vodka routine we used to do? 283 00:23:04,180 --> 00:23:06,059 I had to be six years old then, Dad. 284 00:23:06,759 --> 00:23:09,500 Well, yeah, but we did it almost every day. 285 00:23:09,599 --> 00:23:11,220 How could you forget that? 286 00:23:12,339 --> 00:23:14,619 Maybe it's because I always had to play straight man. 287 00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:18,099 You're no trooper, kid. 288 00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:23,579 Hiya, sweet stuff. 289 00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:25,019 Well, welcome back. 290 00:23:25,059 --> 00:23:28,059 - Thank you, dear. This is my son, Jud. - How do you do? 291 00:23:28,220 --> 00:23:29,920 I've been trying to reach you all morning. 292 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,700 - Oh, client book. - Oh, good, thanks. 294 00:23:35,420 --> 00:23:37,259 Why is your receiver off the hook? 295 00:23:37,720 --> 00:23:39,380 I heard Raquel Welch was in town. 296 00:23:39,559 --> 00:23:41,599 I don't want to be bothered with all those pleading phone calls. 297 00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:44,859 Couldn't you phone me from Las Vegas? 298 00:23:44,980 --> 00:23:47,619 - Well, I was on vacation one night. - So you couldn't pick up the telephone? 00:23:47,780 --> 00:23:50,619 It had been useless. It's like working for Molly Goldberg. Say hi to Jud. 00:23:50,980 --> 00:23:53,019 - You look good kid. - It's nice to see-- 00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:54,819 You've got a hundred messages here, Scottie. 00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,619 - Yeah? - Dad, why don't I just get out of your way? 00:23:57,780 --> 00:23:59,619 Oh, come on. You hang around and watch the pathetic way 00:23:59,780 --> 00:24:01,419 your old man makes a living. What do you got? 00:24:01,580 --> 00:24:04,419 Well, I got the usual phone calls. The guys reach out of town. 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:06,619 They phone, they want to know where the action is. 299 00:24:06,779 --> 00:24:07,140 Yeah, good. 300 00:24:07,299 --> 00:24:09,039 Oh, Dr. Petrelli called twice this morning. 301 00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:11,179 - She said it was urgent. - I'll take care of that. 303 00:24:11,220 --> 00:24:12,819 Anything to do with the hot flashes you've been having lately? 304 00:24:12,839 --> 00:24:14,519 What? Do you listen to him with the hot flashes? 305 00:24:14,579 --> 00:24:16,579 I never had one hot flash. 306 00:24:17,039 --> 00:24:18,940 A few dizzy spells, maybe, but... 00:24:19,039 --> 00:24:22,940 Yeah, brought on by the incredible demands made nightly upon your tired old body. 00:24:23,139 --> 00:24:24,440 - Yeah, did she say that? - Oh, you did. 308 00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:24,619 Oh. 309 00:24:24,940 --> 00:24:26,559 Scottie, the limo's waiting for you. 310 00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:29,180 I phoned Hillary, and she's expecting you in half an hour. 311 00:24:29,519 --> 00:24:30,039 Ah, terrific. 312 00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:30,460 Thank you. 313 00:24:30,539 --> 00:24:31,740 You're going to love Hillary, Judge. 314 00:24:31,799 --> 00:24:33,059 She is, well, she's marvelous. 315 00:24:34,140 --> 00:24:35,579 Is she in show business, too? 316 00:24:37,220 --> 00:24:38,759 Yeah, more or less. 317 00:24:38,859 --> 00:24:41,519 Except she does her entertaining on a one-to-one basis. 318 00:24:41,900 --> 00:24:47,640 She's the kind of girl who makes ends meet by... by making ends meet. 00:24:47,900 --> 00:24:49,640 You mean she's a hooker? 00:24:49,900 --> 00:24:53,940 No. Well, I would prefer to say that she's an old friend who does everything but kiss. 00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:56,640 Listen, I hope that's all. It can wait, can't it? 00:24:56,700 --> 00:24:59,640 We want to pick up Hillary and Jud and I want to spend time together. 00:24:59,900 --> 00:25:03,340 No, no, no, no, no. Dad, there's a photographic exhibition at the Museum of Natural History. 00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:05,840 - I really want to see it. - There's nothing here that can't wait 319 00:25:05,919 --> 00:25:07,720 a few more hours. Go ahead, have a good time. 320 00:25:09,500 --> 00:25:10,519 Are you waiting for rain? 321 00:25:11,900 --> 00:25:14,279 You're not really going out in public in that coat, are you? 322 00:25:16,420 --> 00:25:17,500 Let's go. 00:25:30,420 --> 00:25:34,500 Look, the way I figured it is you can have yourself a few real good years in my business 00:25:34,520 --> 00:25:36,500 and then the wear and tear of it's gonna get to you. 323 00:25:36,519 --> 00:25:37,079 You know what I mean? 324 00:25:37,539 --> 00:25:39,640 Um, yes, I think so. 325 00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:41,819 Yeah, but I was okay because I had a plan, right? 326 00:25:42,180 --> 00:25:45,980 I was gonna give myself a deadline and a goal and then I was gonna retire 00:25:46,180 --> 00:25:47,980 and set myself up with a little travel agency. 327 00:25:48,279 --> 00:25:50,579 And I was doing great. I was doing just great. 328 00:25:50,619 --> 00:25:51,660 I was right on schedule. 329 00:25:52,180 --> 00:25:53,940 And then I got busted. Twice. 330 00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:55,799 Then I got sick. Once. 331 00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,299 And between the doctor's bills and the lawyer's fees, 332 00:25:58,420 --> 00:26:00,839 well, suddenly I found myself knocked right out of the box, 333 00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:02,339 if you'll pardon the expression. 334 00:26:03,299 --> 00:26:06,079 - That must have been very difficult. - Yeah, it was because-- 00:26:06,299 --> 00:26:07,579 - Hey, Scottie. - What? 00:26:07,699 --> 00:26:10,079 Scottie, I didn't tell you what else happened to me. 00:26:10,299 --> 00:26:12,679 On top of everything else, you know my client's book is missing? 00:26:12,799 --> 00:26:15,079 - You're kidding. - Yeah, but you know, I don't understand 00:26:15,299 --> 00:26:18,079 what anybody else would want with it. The whole thing's written in code, and I-- 00:26:18,299 --> 00:26:23,079 Wait a minute. Scottie. Why are you looking so self-satisfied? 00:26:23,299 --> 00:26:28,379 Me? Why? I was just so pleased that the two of you were getting along together so well. 00:26:28,399 --> 00:26:31,079 Yeah, of course you were, but that's not it. What's going on? 00:26:31,299 --> 00:26:32,579 You were very depressed. 00:26:32,799 --> 00:26:35,079 I thought a nice luncheon with an old friend would cheer you up. 00:26:35,299 --> 00:26:39,079 - Why the limousine? - I love limousines. 336 00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:43,759 Well, they prove my theory. If you can't buy happiness, at least you can rent it. 337 00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:48,279 Yeah, I suppose you can say the same thing about me, huh? 00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:13,279 Scottie, Scottie, something is going on here. 338 00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:14,920 You're up to something and I want to know what it is. 339 00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:16,359 Just get your tushy in there. 340 00:27:21,779 --> 00:27:26,000 Scottie, what is this? Do the faces look familiar? Huh? 341 00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:33,140 - Oh, my God. - And they're all your clients. 00:27:33,300 --> 00:27:37,740 - But, Scottie, I don't understand. - Well, you will. You just come with old Dad. 00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:40,140 - Oh, hey. How's your wife? - She's terrific. 00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:42,840 - Bubble Dad. - Bubble Dad? 00:27:42,900 --> 00:27:45,140 You're getting a testimonial luncheon, my dear. 342 00:27:45,259 --> 00:27:46,720 250 bucks a plate. 343 00:27:47,000 --> 00:27:47,400 What? 344 00:27:48,339 --> 00:27:49,700 Come on! Let's hear it! 345 00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:52,480 That's it! Come on! Let's hear it! 346 00:27:52,660 --> 00:27:53,319 That's it! 347 00:27:56,019 --> 00:27:57,640 You're being forcibly retired. 348 00:27:58,299 --> 00:27:59,059 Let's hear it! 349 00:28:00,019 --> 00:28:01,720 Hey, how are you? It's good to see you again. 350 00:28:01,799 --> 00:28:03,099 Sit down. It's going to be a long lunch. 351 00:28:03,119 --> 00:28:07,160 Okay. Sit down, relax. It's going to be a long afternoon. 352 00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:10,660 I suppose you're all wondering why I asked you here today. 353 00:28:13,279 --> 00:28:16,880 No, we all know exactly why we're here today. 354 00:28:17,180 --> 00:28:21,000 And to start things off, we're first going to hear from an old and dear friend of Hillary's, 00:28:21,180 --> 00:28:24,000 Max... ...Kunfarts. Go ahead, Max. 355 00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:35,000 Hey, hey! Jud! Come here, son. 356 00:28:37,000 --> 00:28:40,099 What the hell? You're not leaving already? The luncheon just started. 00:28:40,100 --> 00:28:43,399 Dad, this is the last day of that exhibition, and I really don't want to miss it. 00:28:43,500 --> 00:28:45,099 - Oh, yeah, the, uh... - Yes. 357 00:28:45,400 --> 00:28:47,180 The camera thing, yeah. 358 00:28:47,420 --> 00:28:49,740 Well, okay, I tell you what, why don't you pick me up 00:28:49,820 --> 00:28:51,740 at the Brooks Atkinson Theatre around 2.30, huh? 359 00:28:51,799 --> 00:28:52,759 And then we'll play. 360 00:28:52,859 --> 00:28:54,259 We can visit my money at the track. 361 00:28:55,819 --> 00:28:56,140 Right. 362 00:28:57,140 --> 00:28:59,099 I'll take you to a joint on 42nd Street. 363 00:28:59,200 --> 00:29:00,819 They're gonna let you wrestle a naked lady. 364 00:29:04,140 --> 00:29:05,759 Don't feel like you have to entertain me. 365 00:29:05,920 --> 00:29:09,059 That wasn't for you, kid. The last time I was there, they let me win two out of three falls. 366 00:29:09,940 --> 00:29:11,279 - Look, Dad. - What? 367 00:29:11,700 --> 00:29:13,920 I appreciate everything you're doing. Really, everything. 368 00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:18,619 It's just that... Well, I don't have time for all that. 369 00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:22,400 You see, I don't see the point. 370 00:29:24,720 --> 00:29:27,880 Well, I guess there is no point, Jud. 371 00:29:28,599 --> 00:29:30,200 It's just called having a good time. 372 00:29:31,019 --> 00:29:33,160 Yes, well, I prefer to have a good time my own way. 373 00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:35,339 Thank you. I'll see you around. 374 00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:37,539 Look, Jud, I want to spend time with you. 375 00:29:38,740 --> 00:29:40,000 I mean... 376 00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:44,520 Well, you know, I want to catch up with what you've been doing with your life. Okay? 377 00:29:46,079 --> 00:29:46,960 Sure. 378 00:29:48,539 --> 00:29:49,460 I'll be around. 379 00:29:50,799 --> 00:29:51,099 Yeah. 380 00:29:59,019 --> 00:30:08,000 Hillary, in recognition of your years of arduous service... servicing... 382 00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:14,519 ...we want to present you with this beautiful gold watch. 00:30:14,600 --> 00:30:16,519 Hello, Miss Sally Haines, please. 00:30:16,600 --> 00:30:18,519 - She gave her... - Hi there, how are you? 00:30:18,600 --> 00:30:22,519 Listen, look, you remember that picture you saw of my errant son? 00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:52,519 Anyway, my father was a construction engineer. 383 00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:54,859 We moved around a lot, so I was always the new kid in town. 384 00:30:55,619 --> 00:30:57,619 I was a kind of shy, scruffy-looking kid, 385 00:30:57,660 --> 00:30:58,859 so it was difficult making friends. 386 00:30:59,420 --> 00:31:01,920 You know, you should try this pastrami. It is terrific. 388 00:31:02,059 --> 00:31:03,720 Anyway, I hit on this dumb idea. 389 00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:08,800 I took the first name of the most popular girl from the last school. Can you believe it? 00:31:08,960 --> 00:31:11,000 For about three months, I was actually called Muffin. 00:31:11,160 --> 00:31:15,000 I can't ever imagine you being unattractive or shy. 00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:18,700 - I got over it. - How? 00:31:18,860 --> 00:31:22,000 - I grew tits. - That's funny. That never worked for me. 390 00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:29,259 I think I'm really going to like you. 391 00:31:29,599 --> 00:31:30,039 Why? 392 00:31:30,299 --> 00:31:32,559 Because you didn't say I told you so. 393 00:31:33,519 --> 00:31:34,940 Hold on. Hold on. 394 00:31:36,279 --> 00:31:37,099 This way. 395 00:31:41,640 --> 00:31:44,219 Your father must be pretty loaded to afford a place like this. 00:31:44,440 --> 00:31:45,819 Oh, no, no, not really. 396 00:31:46,339 --> 00:31:49,200 See, his partner, well, his boss, really, is an old friend of his. 397 00:31:49,720 --> 00:31:50,700 He owns the building. 398 00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:52,420 What is it? 399 00:31:53,500 --> 00:31:54,119 Oh, nothing. 400 00:31:55,519 --> 00:31:59,779 I just can't get over the fact that you're here. 401 00:31:59,920 --> 00:32:00,779 You invited me. 402 00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:02,440 Yes, I know. 403 00:32:02,579 --> 00:32:05,960 It's just that you're my first pickup. 404 00:32:06,660 --> 00:32:07,140 I'm sorry. 405 00:32:07,259 --> 00:32:08,359 I didn't mean to sound offensive. 406 00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:13,619 What I mean is I'm not very good at meeting girls, you know. 407 00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:19,220 Well, I thought I'm very pleased that you're here. 408 00:32:19,940 --> 00:32:22,299 Why didn't you talk to me the first time I approached you? 409 00:32:22,819 --> 00:32:24,400 Oh, I didn't know what to say. 410 00:32:25,119 --> 00:32:26,519 Do you have trouble talking to people? 411 00:32:27,220 --> 00:32:28,299 No, I used to stutter. 412 00:32:29,359 --> 00:32:31,079 And then when that cleared up, 413 00:32:31,140 --> 00:32:33,599 I kind of had trouble getting into the hang of things again. 414 00:32:34,180 --> 00:32:35,839 It's not as weird as it sounds. 415 00:32:35,980 --> 00:32:36,420 Wanna bet? 416 00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:38,920 Do you visit your father every summer? 417 00:32:40,680 --> 00:32:41,119 No. 418 00:32:41,700 --> 00:32:44,119 I used to, but I haven't for a couple of years. 419 00:32:44,599 --> 00:32:46,200 Well, why did you decide to visit him this summer? 420 00:32:48,180 --> 00:32:50,940 Oh, a lot of reasons. 421 00:32:52,859 --> 00:32:55,599 You have a lot of trouble talking about anything personal, don't you? 422 00:32:57,339 --> 00:33:01,240 Yes, well, I don't know you very well. 424 00:33:09,099 --> 00:33:12,099 - Can I have a bite of your pickle? - Hmm? 00:33:13,099 --> 00:33:18,099 - Um, well, there's a pickle right there. - I want a bite of yours. 425 00:33:20,099 --> 00:33:24,119 - You can have the whole pickle. - No, just a bite. 426 00:33:30,559 --> 00:33:33,560 There. Now we share a pickle. 428 00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:35,420 Yes. I noticed that. 430 00:33:36,400 --> 00:33:38,299 So now we know each other a lot better. 431 00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:42,500 And you can tell me anything you want. 432 00:33:44,900 --> 00:33:50,799 Okay. I wanted to tie up some loose ends, you see. 434 00:33:51,020 --> 00:33:54,880 I'm going to school out on the West Coast, and that is 3,000 miles away. 436 00:33:59,859 --> 00:34:03,740 Well, I thought this might be a very good opportunity 00:34:03,859 --> 00:34:06,940 to reach a better understanding with my father. 437 00:34:12,179 --> 00:34:13,179 Is that so hard? 438 00:34:15,780 --> 00:34:18,480 You really hated me taking a bite out of your pickle, didn't you? 439 00:34:19,719 --> 00:34:23,600 It's nothing personal. I don't like anyone touching my food. 00:34:23,719 --> 00:34:25,000 And you don't think that's weird? 440 00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:35,060 My God, he's got a girl in here again. I don't believe you. 00:34:35,100 --> 00:34:37,260 I would think after that shabby episode you had with the chambermaid, 00:34:37,300 --> 00:34:39,260 you would have learned your lesson. How do you do, my dear? 00:34:39,300 --> 00:34:42,260 - I'm Scott Templeton, Jeff's teenage father. - How do you do? 00:34:42,300 --> 00:34:45,260 - Where did you find her? - This is Sally Haines, Dad. 00:34:45,300 --> 00:34:47,260 And I found her at the Museum of Natural History. 00:34:47,300 --> 00:34:49,260 I didn't know they let you bring the exhibits home. 00:34:49,300 --> 00:34:52,260 Would you like to join our picnic? We have plenty of food. 00:34:52,300 --> 00:34:56,260 One condition. There'll be absolutely no hugging or kissing. You hear me? 00:34:56,300 --> 00:35:00,260 - Well, we'll try to control ourselves, if you will. - My God, he's making jokes already. 00:35:00,300 --> 00:35:03,260 - It must be good for him. - Shall we dine? 00:35:03,300 --> 00:35:06,260 You two go ahead and start. I'm gonna make myself a drink first. 00:35:06,300 --> 00:35:09,260 - You sit down. I'll get it. - Oh, thank you. 00:35:09,300 --> 00:35:13,060 - Oh, the bar is behind the panel there. - I know. Fourth book for the right. 00:35:13,100 --> 00:35:20,260 Give it a yank. Okay, well, you have. I used to be a cocktail waitress in Lake Tahoe. Oh, shit. 441 00:35:21,679 --> 00:35:23,019 Exactly, yes. 442 00:35:26,659 --> 00:35:29,920 I can explain this, son. We just thought it might be fun. 444 00:35:30,380 --> 00:35:32,599 Come on, I mean, I knew it was a setup all along. 445 00:35:32,900 --> 00:35:33,760 You did? How? 446 00:35:34,679 --> 00:35:36,560 Yes, well, I mean, I looked in the mirror this morning. 447 00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:38,539 I'm not exactly Robert Redford, you know. 448 00:35:40,679 --> 00:35:41,260 Come on. 449 00:35:41,900 --> 00:35:45,519 What do you think you're dealing with here? I mean, I happen to be a college graduate. 451 00:35:45,739 --> 00:35:48,380 If you knew it was a setup from the start, why did you go through with it? 452 00:35:48,460 --> 00:35:50,900 Listen, I never said my father didn't have taste. 453 00:35:52,599 --> 00:35:53,480 I'm really sorry. 454 00:35:53,539 --> 00:35:54,780 There's nothing to be sorry about. 455 00:35:57,699 --> 00:35:58,539 We're gonna dine or what? 456 00:36:00,699 --> 00:36:03,659 - I guess I overplayed my role, Scottie. - Huh? 458 00:36:04,320 --> 00:36:06,739 Oh, well, no harm done, love. 459 00:36:06,880 --> 00:36:08,320 It looks like you got the part anyway. 460 00:36:10,260 --> 00:36:13,840 I tell you, I think I'll take a little rain check on dinner. 461 00:36:14,440 --> 00:36:15,939 I do have a late date. 462 00:36:16,040 --> 00:36:21,039 I've got to perfume my body and slip into something stunning. 463 00:36:22,000 --> 00:36:26,000 Jud, I'm sorry. Okay? 464 00:36:28,000 --> 00:36:31,000 I promise you there'll be no more cheering from the cheap seats. 465 00:36:33,000 --> 00:36:35,320 That's just about the most charming man I've ever met. 00:36:36,000 --> 00:36:41,320 Oh, yes. He's built a whole career on it. Never met a man he couldn't charm. 00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:45,320 He just wanted you to have a good time, Jud. 466 00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:50,239 My father has made a living from being a court jester and a glorified pimp. 467 00:36:50,479 --> 00:36:53,500 I don't want him pimping for me, okay? 468 00:36:53,859 --> 00:36:58,619 - If he's a pimp, what does that make me? - I don't make those sort of judgments. 470 00:36:58,879 --> 00:36:59,860 You don't. That's all you do. 471 00:36:59,960 --> 00:37:03,380 Look, you don't know a damn thing about him. 472 00:37:04,300 --> 00:37:07,380 I'll see you later. Not too soon, I hope. 473 00:37:25,199 --> 00:37:26,280 Yes? 00:38:00,199 --> 00:38:01,280 Hold up. 00:38:13,199 --> 00:38:18,280 You know how good it is to see that you can still... still laugh? 474 00:38:18,760 --> 00:38:20,460 Well, it's not funny. 475 00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:23,039 It's stupid. It's so courting. 476 00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:26,500 What the hell do you expect at these prices, Noël Coward? 477 00:38:28,500 --> 00:38:33,500 - I didn't expect anything. - Oh, God. I don't know. 478 00:38:34,500 --> 00:38:38,500 I figured that you were, shall we say, slightly obsessed with... 479 00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:43,199 I don't know. I just thought if somehow I could get you laughing first, 00:38:43,300 --> 00:38:46,199 it just might make it a little easier to apologize. 480 00:38:52,780 --> 00:38:53,719 Hey, where's Sally? 481 00:38:54,820 --> 00:38:55,639 Well, she left. 482 00:38:56,679 --> 00:38:58,420 What do you mean? Why? 483 00:38:58,699 --> 00:39:02,360 I, um... I think I called her a whore. 484 00:39:05,460 --> 00:39:05,860 Jesus. 485 00:39:07,260 --> 00:39:08,980 Of course, I would have played it differently. 486 00:39:09,639 --> 00:39:11,579 What in the hell did you do a thing like that for? 487 00:39:11,739 --> 00:39:14,559 I guess I just overreacted to that whole situation. 488 00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:16,300 You overreacted. Jesus. 489 00:39:17,500 --> 00:39:18,179 What the hell? 490 00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:19,980 You look ridiculous. 491 00:39:20,639 --> 00:39:21,579 You're damn right. 492 00:39:21,760 --> 00:39:24,760 Hey, does that bring back memories, though, huh? 00:39:24,860 --> 00:39:26,760 Why'd you keep it all these years? 493 00:39:28,380 --> 00:39:29,099 Sentimental reasons. 494 00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:35,780 When you split with Mom, why didn't you tell me about it? 495 00:39:40,559 --> 00:39:44,579 Well, when I... Well, you're going back a few years, aren't you, son? 00:39:44,759 --> 00:39:47,579 Oh, that's okay. I really didn't expect an answer. 496 00:39:51,599 --> 00:39:56,139 Well, uh... Was it that rough on you, Jud? 497 00:39:57,619 --> 00:39:58,920 Oh, I got used to it. 498 00:39:59,679 --> 00:40:02,099 It's just that I woke up one morning and you had gone. 499 00:40:03,659 --> 00:40:04,099 Yeah. 500 00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:13,000 Well, uh... I never really could figure it out myself, Jud. 00:40:14,100 --> 00:40:18,000 Well, of course, you were very young. I didn't know the right words. 00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:21,000 What about afterwards? 501 00:40:28,000 --> 00:40:31,000 Afterwards, I didn't have the guts. 502 00:40:31,700 --> 00:40:33,000 I'm sorry. 503 00:40:36,000 --> 00:40:41,000 Yes, well, I appreciate the directness of your answer. 504 00:40:42,100 --> 00:40:45,260 - You want some wine? - Uh, no. 505 00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:47,039 Thank you. 506 00:40:52,420 --> 00:40:56,980 Well, I'm not going to stand idly by and watch you become some hopeless alcoholic 00:40:57,180 --> 00:41:00,780 - over a lover's tip, you know? - Dad, she's just a girl 507 00:41:00,900 --> 00:41:03,800 - I've known for about six hours. - Yeah, exactly. 508 00:41:04,400 --> 00:41:07,519 But, uh, I suspect you might like to see her again. 509 00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:09,780 How do I do that? 510 00:41:10,099 --> 00:41:11,699 Oh, well, hell, now you're talking, son. 511 00:41:11,780 --> 00:41:15,220 You see, it has been my experience in matters such as these 00:41:15,320 --> 00:41:17,320 that the best course of action is begging and pleading. 512 00:41:18,260 --> 00:41:19,639 You think I should grovel? 513 00:41:19,960 --> 00:41:20,559 Groveling's good. 514 00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:24,420 Oh, you get down on your knees and kiss the hem of her dress if you have to. 515 00:41:25,139 --> 00:41:28,500 Okay. If groveling's what it takes, I'll grovel. 516 00:41:28,539 --> 00:41:30,179 Ah, I'll make a man of you, my boy. 517 00:41:36,179 --> 00:41:37,380 What will you do, huh? 518 00:41:37,679 --> 00:41:40,020 Oh, hell, don't worry about me, Jud. I'll find plenty of work to do. 519 00:41:40,179 --> 00:41:42,420 Somebody always wants their name in the paper or something. 520 00:41:47,480 --> 00:41:49,639 You know, a couple of years ago, 521 00:41:49,780 --> 00:41:52,599 I came across some of those stories you wrote before you went to the coast. 522 00:41:53,639 --> 00:41:54,920 You never told me that. 523 00:41:55,099 --> 00:41:55,900 They were very good. 524 00:41:57,519 --> 00:41:59,159 No, not really, no. 525 00:41:59,340 --> 00:42:00,340 I thought so, yes. 526 00:42:01,480 --> 00:42:01,940 You did? 527 00:42:04,300 --> 00:42:04,739 Wow. 528 00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:10,260 Well, that's... Well, they fooled a lot of people, Jud. 529 00:42:10,300 --> 00:42:11,739 Well, hell, that's the story of my life, son. 530 00:42:11,780 --> 00:42:13,079 All the form, none of the ability. 531 00:42:13,780 --> 00:42:16,000 That doesn't explain the quality of the work I read. 532 00:42:16,099 --> 00:42:19,179 Well, I don't say I was, you know, totally without talent. 533 00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:23,119 I was a pretty good literary mimic, is what I was. 00:42:23,240 --> 00:42:25,719 I was good enough to get to the West Coast, anyway. 534 00:42:26,079 --> 00:42:27,099 And then you stopped writing. 535 00:42:27,440 --> 00:42:28,280 Yeah, but not right away. 536 00:42:28,500 --> 00:42:29,840 Oh, God, when I got to Hollywood, 537 00:42:30,059 --> 00:42:35,239 I found that it was cheap, vulgar, tacky, superficial, 538 00:42:35,760 --> 00:42:37,679 everything that I'd always wanted. 539 00:42:38,280 --> 00:42:40,920 So what the heck? I mean, with distractions like that, 541 00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:44,000 naturally my concentration, which was never my strong suit, 00:42:44,260 --> 00:42:48,000 dwindled to that of a monkey. And there was obviously only one thing 00:42:48,260 --> 00:42:54,000 that I could do: become a producer. And the rest, as they say, is show business tree. 542 00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:58,000 Tell me something. Does it ever bother you 00:42:58,100 --> 00:43:02,000 that you have nothing you can point to with any pride? 543 00:43:04,599 --> 00:43:07,800 Well, I'd always rather hoped that it would be you. 544 00:43:12,659 --> 00:43:13,139 Yes. 545 00:43:13,780 --> 00:43:16,699 Well, um, I have enjoyed having this talk. 546 00:43:17,079 --> 00:43:19,880 So have I, Mr. Carstairs. I'm certainly going to speak to my little woman 00:43:19,979 --> 00:43:22,680 about that insurance policy. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, damn it. 548 00:43:25,400 --> 00:43:27,599 It's just that sometimes 549 00:43:29,039 --> 00:43:33,780 when things affect me emotionally, I make inappropriate responses. 00:43:34,039 --> 00:43:36,780 Oh God, so do I. 550 00:43:37,920 --> 00:43:39,780 So do I, son. 00:44:23,920 --> 00:44:24,780 Who is it? 551 00:44:25,619 --> 00:44:26,659 It's a mugger. 552 00:44:27,719 --> 00:44:28,519 My mother? 553 00:44:37,940 --> 00:44:38,900 Forgive me. 554 00:44:39,380 --> 00:44:40,940 Or just kick the bike away. 555 00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:43,280 Oh, my God! 556 00:44:43,940 --> 00:44:44,880 Oh, my God! 557 00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:46,000 I gotcha! 00:44:57,000 --> 00:45:01,000 - Oh, boy. - May I come in? 00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:03,000 Come on in. 558 00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:10,000 - I raised 50. - Take my money. 00:45:10,100 --> 00:45:12,000 - Oh, God. I got two pairs. - Yeah, I got a straight. 00:45:12,100 --> 00:45:16,000 - Oh! - You know, Audrey, my second wife, 00:45:16,100 --> 00:45:19,000 only tennis players that ever had a playboy centerfold layout. 00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:21,000 Only the sex wasn't really that great. 00:45:22,100 --> 00:45:25,000 After it, she always looked at me like I'd given her a bad line call. 559 00:45:25,820 --> 00:45:27,800 Scottie, you're gonna deal or you're gonna tell us your mom was? 560 00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:29,059 And take your money. 561 00:45:31,940 --> 00:45:33,400 What the hell do you think you're doing? 562 00:45:34,400 --> 00:45:37,059 Whatever happened to hello, for heaven's sake? 563 00:45:37,980 --> 00:45:41,219 Gentlemen, I want you to meet an old family retainer, Dr. Gladys Petrelli. 564 00:45:41,340 --> 00:45:42,440 She's crazy about my body. 565 00:45:43,659 --> 00:45:46,840 - This isn't a social call, Scottie. - You always say that, love. 567 00:45:46,920 --> 00:45:48,599 How many times do I have to tell you, Gladys, 568 00:45:48,619 --> 00:45:51,119 I won't take my clothes off without a nurse present? 569 00:45:52,099 --> 00:45:53,840 I'll look back in three minutes in for the cops. 570 00:45:55,039 --> 00:45:55,940 Let's play poker. 571 00:45:56,199 --> 00:45:56,780 Deal, Andy. 572 00:45:58,239 --> 00:46:02,000 As an eminent physician, your bedside manner leaves a lot that we desire, kid. 573 00:46:02,159 --> 00:46:05,660 Don't play games with me, Scottie. Why did you sneak out of that hospital? 575 00:46:05,860 --> 00:46:08,760 - Why are you limping on your good foot? - Because my feet swell when I fly. 577 00:46:08,920 --> 00:46:11,780 I had to leave that conference in Washington just to see you. 578 00:46:11,820 --> 00:46:12,599 I think that's terrific. 579 00:46:12,739 --> 00:46:15,139 All the doctors in the country, I get the one who makes house calls. 580 00:46:15,219 --> 00:46:18,659 Don't you think it's time that you started acting like a responsible adult? 581 00:46:18,760 --> 00:46:20,440 Oh, you're going to make impossible demands. 00:46:20,760 --> 00:46:23,440 I mean, didn't you understand what Hal Shumway and I told you yesterday? 582 00:46:23,679 --> 00:46:27,159 I mean, didn't we spell out why the treatments must be started immediately? 583 00:46:27,420 --> 00:46:30,460 - Didn't we lay everything on the line? - No, not everything. 00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:33,460 You left out some charming side effects like my hair is gonna fall out. 584 00:46:33,480 --> 00:46:34,039 So what? 585 00:46:34,260 --> 00:46:37,079 So what? You know how I hate not looking my best. 586 00:46:38,519 --> 00:46:39,159 What are you doing? 587 00:46:39,539 --> 00:46:41,139 I'm getting you another room at the hospital. 588 00:46:41,360 --> 00:46:42,980 Oh, no, you're not. You're gonna put the phone down. 589 00:46:44,300 --> 00:46:46,139 Gladys, let's play put down the phone. It's very simple. 00:46:46,300 --> 00:46:48,139 You just take the phone, you put it down. That's all there is to-- 00:46:48,300 --> 00:46:51,139 What the hell do I have to do? Wrestle you to the ground? Come on. 00:46:51,300 --> 00:46:53,139 I have something important to say. 590 00:46:56,360 --> 00:47:01,699 - You have two minutes, Scottie. - The kid just got into town today, Gladys. 00:47:01,760 --> 00:47:04,099 Now, how the hell am I supposed to be amusing, 00:47:04,160 --> 00:47:07,399 lying in some hospital cot with a hose off my nose, huh? 00:47:07,460 --> 00:47:10,099 - Scottie, just--. - Now, look, please, let's face it. 00:47:10,160 --> 00:47:13,699 As a father, I've been strictly a lounge act. 00:47:13,960 --> 00:47:17,699 I need time, love. I've got to freshen up my image. 591 00:47:18,239 --> 00:47:22,840 Stop tap dancing, Scottie. You've got to go back to another hospital. Why not tonight? 592 00:47:22,940 --> 00:47:28,019 No, not tonight. Yeah, I'm sorry. My dance card is all filled. 594 00:47:28,100 --> 00:47:31,719 Oh! My goodness. We don't seem to have these in your size. 596 00:47:31,819 --> 00:47:35,760 However, you might be interested in our blue suede slingback pumps. 597 00:47:37,119 --> 00:47:39,539 - All right. Not tonight. - Good. 600 00:47:39,659 --> 00:47:41,719 - Tomorrow. - Tomorrow? 602 00:47:42,019 --> 00:47:44,380 I'll pick you up on my way to the hospital. 603 00:47:44,500 --> 00:47:47,000 - Be ready at 8 o'clock. - Were you ever in the Marines? 00:47:47,100 --> 00:47:52,000 - Need anything to help you sleep? - Oh, sleep. Ha, ha. 00:47:52,100 --> 00:47:57,000 After these treatments of yours... 604 00:47:57,000 --> 00:47:59,000 ...a fairly normal life. 605 00:48:00,000 --> 00:48:05,559 It won't all be velvet, Scottie, but with luck, the good times will outweigh the bad. 606 00:48:08,059 --> 00:48:10,019 - What about sex? - If you want. 608 00:48:10,199 --> 00:48:12,739 Turn the lights. Strip your clothes off. Lie down on the couch. 611 00:48:12,820 --> 00:48:17,300 - Don't make any rash promises. - One kiss, at least? 613 00:48:17,459 --> 00:48:20,280 Just right here. Right now. 615 00:48:21,539 --> 00:48:25,119 I let you feel my foot. That should be enough for you. 617 00:48:25,340 --> 00:48:26,340 Gladys. 618 00:48:32,280 --> 00:48:33,539 I'm terrified. 619 00:48:35,780 --> 00:48:37,000 I know, Scottie. 00:49:19,580 --> 00:49:28,000 Oh, God. Do this. Oh, jeez. Oh, do, do, do. Oh, jeez. Yeah. 620 00:49:46,000 --> 00:49:51,000 Hi there. how are you? I'd like to speak to a Mr. Lou Daniels, please. 00:49:51,100 --> 00:49:57,000 I don't know what room number. And it... hmm? He's not gonna be back to... A message? 00:49:57,100 --> 00:49:59,700 Yeah, just tell him his lawyer called about the morals charges. 00:50:00,800 --> 00:50:04,700 Wait a minute. Operator? Yeah, there's no sense keeping the poor man in suspense. 00:50:04,800 --> 00:50:08,000 Tell him one of the triplet dropped the charges. The other two are still sticking to this story. 00:50:08,100 --> 00:50:09,000 He's got my number. 00:50:10,100 --> 00:50:11,000 For his sake. 621 00:50:24,000 --> 00:50:24,739 Phew. 622 00:50:25,300 --> 00:50:28,039 Oh, God. I'm going around the bend, for God's sake. I'm going around the bend. 623 00:50:28,300 --> 00:50:30,039 I'm doing bits. Nobody's here to see it. 624 00:50:30,719 --> 00:50:32,800 Oh, my God! It's the old lady! 625 00:50:32,920 --> 00:50:36,000 Estelle, down from the chandelier, my pet! Quickly! 626 00:50:36,340 --> 00:50:40,920 Everybody, back into your clothes. Let go of my leg, you silly mad goose, you! 627 00:50:41,299 --> 00:50:43,679 I'm coming! 628 00:50:43,920 --> 00:50:47,019 Gertrude, I'm from under the oven, but she is up. 629 00:50:47,179 --> 00:50:48,920 Everybody act normal. 630 00:50:49,360 --> 00:50:50,139 Hi. 631 00:50:50,319 --> 00:50:51,820 Pull up your pants, Scottie. 632 00:50:52,039 --> 00:50:54,440 Why? You always said my right leg was my greatest feature. 633 00:50:54,559 --> 00:50:56,800 Well, it's still adorable, but I'm a married woman. 634 00:50:56,840 --> 00:50:59,340 Yeah, well, you always were a loyal little beast. 635 00:50:59,480 --> 00:51:00,820 You had your chance. 637 00:51:02,099 --> 00:51:05,299 - How are you? - It's been a funny day. 639 00:51:05,359 --> 00:51:06,420 What do you mean? Funny? 640 00:51:06,680 --> 00:51:07,719 Cue your funny ha ha. 641 00:51:07,960 --> 00:51:10,260 Funny. I didn't know it was going to turn out this way. 642 00:51:10,360 --> 00:51:10,840 How's you get? 643 00:51:21,099 --> 00:51:26,320 One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine. 644 00:51:27,019 --> 00:51:29,619 You want one of mine? 645 00:51:35,280 --> 00:51:38,179 I think you're avoiding the moment of truth. 00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:49,320 This way! 646 00:51:50,380 --> 00:51:52,920 You look like big birds! 647 00:52:00,800 --> 00:52:02,699 Welcome back to the River Cafe, Mr. Templeton. 648 00:52:03,119 --> 00:52:04,159 - Thank you. - Good to see you, sir. 649 00:52:04,179 --> 00:52:05,080 Thank you. Nice to see you. 651 00:52:05,199 --> 00:52:06,819 - Could I get you a cocktail? - Yes, sure you bet you. 653 00:52:07,079 --> 00:52:11,960 All of my usual and, uh, ooh, uh, scotch soda, no ice. 654 00:52:14,099 --> 00:52:16,940 How come you always remember what everybody drinks? 655 00:52:17,440 --> 00:52:20,059 Well, I had the soul of a hundred-dollar hooker. 656 00:52:20,920 --> 00:52:23,920 Did I ever tell you how I knew when you were cheating on me? 657 00:52:24,519 --> 00:52:26,380 You probably... 00:52:27,019 --> 00:52:29,380 You always switched your drink to the one the woman drank. 658 00:52:30,039 --> 00:52:33,559 I... well, I never did have a strong sense of identity. 659 00:52:34,880 --> 00:52:38,219 Anyhow, as I was saying, she is the perfect girl for him. 660 00:52:38,579 --> 00:52:40,840 She's going to show him the finer things of the life. 661 00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:41,900 Like what? 662 00:52:42,820 --> 00:52:51,259 Well, like... laughter and sex and ulcers and alimony and all the things that make you want 00:52:51,320 --> 00:52:52,059 to get up in the morning. 00:52:52,820 --> 00:52:56,559 Well, apart from the sex education, now how are you two getting along? 00:52:57,820 --> 00:53:00,559 Well, we're not exactly Andy and Judge Hardy yet. 00:53:01,820 --> 00:53:05,559 Oh, God, we had a good talk going this morning, you know. Started to open up. 663 00:53:07,940 --> 00:53:14,420 Lord, there is scar tissue there. I don't know, Maggie. I have high hopes. 664 00:53:15,099 --> 00:53:16,880 So I. It'll just take time. 665 00:53:20,539 --> 00:53:22,579 - I'm sorry. - Oh, come on. 00:53:22,639 --> 00:53:26,079 - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. - My God, you're serious. Don't do that. 668 00:53:26,240 --> 00:53:29,199 - I'm...I'm...Really - Please. Maggie, don't be sorry. 669 00:53:29,539 --> 00:53:30,860 Don't. 670 00:53:31,119 --> 00:53:32,440 Okay. 671 00:53:32,919 --> 00:53:36,079 And do me a favor. Don't make a tragedy out of this, okay? 00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:37,359 Okay. 673 00:53:47,800 --> 00:53:49,659 It's impossible to get a cab when it's raining. 674 00:53:53,239 --> 00:53:54,699 I don't believe it. 675 00:53:55,420 --> 00:53:57,480 Well, you said you wanted a cab. 676 00:53:59,099 --> 00:54:00,280 Not bad. 677 00:54:09,680 --> 00:54:10,259 OK. 678 00:54:25,179 --> 00:54:30,579 - Do you mind talking about it? - What, love? In my delicate condition? 681 00:54:30,700 --> 00:54:33,460 Hell, I stop strangers in the street. 682 00:54:33,840 --> 00:54:36,760 Because if you don't, I don't. 683 00:54:37,099 --> 00:54:37,760 What? 684 00:54:37,960 --> 00:54:40,300 Well, I mean, if it helps at all. 685 00:54:40,839 --> 00:54:44,720 - I'm here. - God. Maggie, Maggie, Maggie. 688 00:54:44,820 --> 00:54:45,319 I mean it. 689 00:54:47,800 --> 00:54:48,780 I love you. 690 00:54:52,079 --> 00:54:55,420 Well, you don't think about it all the time, you know? 691 00:54:55,799 --> 00:54:56,139 Well, I don't. 692 00:54:58,960 --> 00:55:04,159 I think the body has some sort of a built-in mechanism to protect. 00:55:06,960 --> 00:55:12,159 I'll tell you though, boy, when they laid it on me, I just... 693 00:55:13,119 --> 00:55:18,480 Why me? Why? Why when right away I went to that stage? 00:55:19,119 --> 00:55:22,980 You know, I really know a lot of guys, well, some guys, 00:55:23,119 --> 00:55:26,480 they would mind all that much just cashing it in. 694 00:55:27,840 --> 00:55:29,380 I like it here. 695 00:55:30,820 --> 00:55:31,639 I always have. 696 00:55:35,980 --> 00:55:37,500 Did you know the weird thing? 697 00:55:38,739 --> 00:55:40,519 I didn't resent dying. 698 00:55:42,940 --> 00:55:46,000 What bothered me was knowing when. 699 00:55:48,000 --> 00:55:52,000 I guess somehow it robs the event of all spontaneity. 700 00:55:53,500 --> 00:55:58,000 Oh, yeah, then I wanted to drink more and get religion. 701 00:55:59,000 --> 00:56:01,000 But there's one problem. 702 00:56:01,500 --> 00:56:04,000 Too much liquor makes me sick and... 703 00:56:05,000 --> 00:56:13,059 I don't know. Somehow... God never caught my attention. 00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:18,159 Well, eventually, why not me? What are you gonna do? What are you... 00:56:18,300 --> 00:56:23,959 And at that point, love, so help me, really, I expected some incredible revelation. 704 00:56:25,500 --> 00:56:28,460 Everything would suddenly... 705 00:56:29,720 --> 00:56:33,960 I'll tell you, if I do get any sudden revelations, you're gonna be the first to know, kid. 706 00:56:34,739 --> 00:56:40,599 I'm sorry, I didn't mean to turn this into an evening with... 00:56:50,739 --> 00:56:51,799 You know the worst part? 707 00:56:53,739 --> 00:56:54,960 It's the loss. 708 00:56:58,239 --> 00:57:09,000 I mean, when a friend dies, you lose a friend. But when you die, you lose all of your friends. 710 00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:16,500 What the hell is that? What the... Jesus. Happy days, kid. Going'round the bend. 00:57:16,700 --> 00:57:18,700 Jesus, I don't believe me. 00:57:18,800 --> 00:57:19,300 - Scottie. - Hmm? 00:57:19,800 --> 00:57:22,000 - You know I have to go back tomorrow. - Yes. 00:57:22,100 --> 00:57:25,500 But if you want me to come back down here later, I will. 00:57:25,600 --> 00:57:28,900 My love, I love you and I thank you, but it is not all that imminent. 00:57:29,000 --> 00:57:31,000 Oh, my God, I'm gonna be around for a while. 711 00:57:36,000 --> 00:57:38,000 Not to change the subject, but... 712 00:57:46,000 --> 00:57:52,519 Did I ever tell you about the time when I took Jud fishing at a... Oh, Jesus. 00:57:53,000 --> 00:57:57,519 A fish farm where you're guaranteed to catch a fish. You know what I mean? Okay. 00:57:57,600 --> 00:57:59,219 Ten bucks a pop, right? Plot point. 00:57:59,300 --> 00:58:03,519 Well, he was so happy casting away with his little pole and casting away. 00:58:03,600 --> 00:58:07,519 I snuck off to a local gin game. I came back about two and a half hours later. 714 00:58:07,600 --> 00:58:10,019 I caught the kid sitting on a mound of 28 trouts. 715 00:58:10,219 --> 00:58:12,380 Well, guess what that caused me? 716 00:58:14,219 --> 00:58:16,800 Damn it, I think I'm making myself cry. 717 00:58:17,059 --> 00:58:20,239 No, you did it because you know that I can't stand kindness. 718 00:58:22,739 --> 00:58:23,679 Well, that's terrific. 719 00:58:24,260 --> 00:58:24,980 That's terrific. 720 00:58:25,000 --> 00:58:28,000 I got a tar of water coming out of my nose. What? 00:58:28,100 --> 00:58:33,000 Oh, my God, you don't suppose I'm pregnant too, do you? God, Maggie, what the hell? 721 00:58:40,500 --> 00:58:42,800 Let me ask you one question, love. 00:58:44,000 --> 00:58:48,800 You don't suppose I'm being a little too macho about the whole thing, do you? 722 00:58:51,679 --> 00:58:53,599 Don't, please don't do that, because I'm fine. 723 00:58:53,719 --> 00:58:57,159 It's just that I can't believe that the whole... Oh, Jesus. 724 00:58:59,460 --> 00:59:00,639 Ah, damn it. 725 00:59:01,840 --> 00:59:04,119 Look, I'm fine. I'm fine, you see. 726 00:59:04,579 --> 00:59:08,239 My mascara running. Where is my... 727 00:59:12,079 --> 00:59:13,099 I'm sorry. 00:59:40,079 --> 00:59:44,099 Oh, God, Maggie. Times have changed, love. 728 00:59:45,840 --> 00:59:47,360 Mr. Matthew in the bed. 01:00:18,840 --> 01:00:24,360 Hey, Jud. Hey. What are you doing in the home so early, son? 01:00:24,540 --> 01:00:25,360 Sally kicked me out. 729 01:00:25,480 --> 01:00:26,579 Oh, you struck out. 730 01:00:26,639 --> 01:00:31,719 Oh, no, it wasn't your fault, Coach. Smaller problem with the recent appendectomy... 731 01:00:31,960 --> 01:00:32,980 Oh so, I forgot. 732 01:00:33,860 --> 01:00:35,320 I have a date with her for breakfast. 733 01:00:35,840 --> 01:00:38,260 - But tomorrow morning... - Scottie, I can't find my skirt. 734 01:00:38,400 --> 01:00:40,960 I don't know whether you tore it off me in the heat of passion down there. 736 01:00:47,340 --> 01:00:51,579 You know, I bet if you were a private detective that 01:00:51,740 --> 01:00:55,579 your mom and I'd probably end up in some of those funny grainy black and white shots. 737 01:00:56,820 --> 01:01:00,760 Jud, don't be upset, son. We were reminiscing, I got carried away. 01:01:00,820 --> 01:01:05,760 - Get the hell away from me. - Jud, you don't understand the situation. 01:01:05,820 --> 01:01:12,760 Don't understand the situation? Oh, I think I've always understood the situation. 01:01:13,820 --> 01:01:17,760 I have a totally amoral, irresponsible, selfish child for a father 01:01:17,820 --> 01:01:20,260 who doesn't care who he hurts as long as he gets his own way. 01:01:20,320 --> 01:01:22,760 God, Jud, we can handle the situation, but... 01:01:22,820 --> 01:01:30,760 How are we going to handle it? Are you going to climb in your chicken costume? My God! 01:01:30,820 --> 01:01:32,760 How do you live with yourself? 01:01:32,820 --> 01:01:36,760 I mean, what reason do you give yourself for waking up in the morning? 01:01:36,820 --> 01:01:39,760 I mean, what are you doing here besides taking up space? 01:01:39,820 --> 01:01:45,760 - Jud, listen to me. Jud! - No, no, no, no, no, no. 01:01:51,620 --> 01:01:56,760 I'm the one that's gonna die, not him, right? I don't give it there anymore. 01:02:04,820 --> 01:02:06,760 Jud, listen to me. I have to talk to you about your father. 738 01:02:06,920 --> 01:02:08,500 Oh, I know all about my father. 739 01:02:08,659 --> 01:02:10,239 Tell me something, Mum. 740 01:02:10,780 --> 01:02:13,480 What was it like being married to a man who cheapens everything he touches? 741 01:02:13,760 --> 01:02:16,119 Now, listen, I had something to do with what happened tonight, too. 742 01:02:16,280 --> 01:02:18,139 - Why don't you hate him? - Oh, would you grow up? 744 01:02:18,980 --> 01:02:20,800 I was grown up when I was eight years old. 745 01:02:22,639 --> 01:02:25,059 - Jud, you can't leave him. - Why not? 746 01:02:26,240 --> 01:02:28,000 Because... 747 01:02:30,000 --> 01:02:32,000 Because he's dying. 748 01:02:34,000 --> 01:02:36,000 What? 749 01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:43,980 Yeah, I... He just found out a couple of days ago. 750 01:02:51,380 --> 01:02:52,920 Well, I wish I could feel something. 751 01:02:55,199 --> 01:02:58,099 It really doesn't change the situation much, does it? 752 01:02:58,239 --> 01:03:01,719 I mean, he's still the same man he's always been. 753 01:03:02,800 --> 01:03:04,880 He's still your father. 01:03:10,000 --> 01:03:11,080 Jud! 01:04:24,000 --> 01:04:26,080 Oh, fine time to be getting home. 754 01:04:26,279 --> 01:04:29,619 Oh, really, Sophia, you must stop sneaking into my apartment. 755 01:04:30,199 --> 01:04:32,320 Oh, you look like you could use some coffee. 756 01:04:33,659 --> 01:04:35,239 I was worried about you. 757 01:04:35,679 --> 01:04:37,340 Oh, what did you think I was going to do? 758 01:04:39,840 --> 01:04:44,099 I tell you it did cross my mind to throw myself right in front of a taxi. 759 01:04:45,119 --> 01:04:47,719 Only I thought that'd rather a tacky thing to do to the driver. 760 01:04:50,219 --> 01:04:54,880 So then I decided I was going to pin a generous tip to my coat lapel. 761 01:04:55,239 --> 01:04:57,960 I'm only trying to figure out what 20% of my life comes to, 762 01:04:58,039 --> 01:04:59,679 so to slow down the momentum. 763 01:04:59,880 --> 01:05:01,599 What do you tip for a suicide anyway? 764 01:05:01,880 --> 01:05:02,539 $5,000. 765 01:05:02,860 --> 01:05:03,440 That much? 766 01:05:03,659 --> 01:05:07,679 Well, you've gone through your life overtipping, why change now. So what did you do? 01:05:07,759 --> 01:05:11,679 I just walked the streets, you know, examining my entire life. 01:05:11,759 --> 01:05:12,979 - For how long? - Five minutes. 01:05:13,059 --> 01:05:15,679 It's a short subject at best, believe me. 767 01:05:18,920 --> 01:05:22,000 - Oh, fuck. Is Jud still here? - I don't know. 01:05:22,220 --> 01:05:26,000 Oh. Well, that kid doesn't know a good exit speech when he makes one. 01:05:26,220 --> 01:05:28,000 Did you tell him I was gonna croak? 01:05:28,220 --> 01:05:30,800 Oh, I wish you'd stop talking like Humphrey Bogart. 01:05:31,020 --> 01:05:33,000 No, come on. Never mind that now. Did you? 768 01:05:35,000 --> 01:05:36,000 No. 769 01:05:38,000 --> 01:05:41,000 - I felt that should be your decision. - Yeah. 770 01:05:45,000 --> 01:05:46,000 You gonna let him stay? 771 01:05:48,940 --> 01:05:52,079 I had an aunt once who said children ought to be like waffles. 772 01:05:52,820 --> 01:05:54,440 You should be able to throw the first one out. 773 01:05:55,960 --> 01:06:01,159 Yes, well, Jud may be a little charred around the edges, 774 01:06:01,340 --> 01:06:02,900 but he's still the child you've got. 775 01:06:03,300 --> 01:06:06,980 And whatever happened to your plan to introduce him to the finer things in life? 776 01:06:07,119 --> 01:06:10,179 I don't think he has the talent for it, dear. I really don't. 777 01:06:10,920 --> 01:06:13,820 He didn't mean everything he said, you know, Scottie. 778 01:06:14,380 --> 01:06:16,579 What? Nothing he said gave us any surprise to me. 779 01:06:16,840 --> 01:06:19,389 - Oh. - Oh, hell, I've always known what I am. 781 01:06:20,440 --> 01:06:23,019 I think that the trick was to know what you should be. 782 01:06:25,699 --> 01:06:26,179 Listen. 783 01:06:32,820 --> 01:06:35,119 You're still living one step ahead of the bailiffs? 784 01:06:35,380 --> 01:06:36,940 Don't be coy with me, woman. 785 01:06:37,019 --> 01:06:38,880 If you need cab fare, come right out with it. 786 01:06:40,480 --> 01:06:44,599 No, I mean... This situation could get expensive. 787 01:06:44,719 --> 01:06:51,500 Oh, I know. I'm fine. Last week I came out 2,000 ahead in the gin game. 788 01:07:01,300 --> 01:07:07,000 Maggie? Yeah? What are you stalling for? Hm? 789 01:07:08,000 --> 01:07:12,060 - I don't know how to say goodbye. - Ah, yeah. 01:07:13,000 --> 01:07:18,860 God, am I good at it. Just give me a tender, chaste kiss. 01:07:20,000 --> 01:07:23,860 Right there. Okay? 790 01:07:28,579 --> 01:07:32,539 Well, I think I'm offended. 791 01:07:32,919 --> 01:07:34,739 You never used to let a girl kiss you on the cheek. 792 01:07:34,979 --> 01:07:37,719 Well, lately my timing has all shot to hell, eh? 793 01:07:44,199 --> 01:07:47,680 I'll, um, keep in touch. 01:08:39,199 --> 01:08:41,580 Now, what are you doing standing over here? 794 01:08:41,859 --> 01:08:43,000 Waiting for you to leave. 795 01:08:46,000 --> 01:08:48,700 Right, I... I can understand that. 796 01:08:52,000 --> 01:08:57,559 I hope... you'll be able to understand what happened last night. 01:08:58,300 --> 01:09:05,159 And what about your current husband? I guess you think he'll understand, too. 797 01:09:07,140 --> 01:09:10,119 - I think he will. - Hmm. 799 01:09:10,420 --> 01:09:14,140 - If I choose to tell him. - That's your problem. 801 01:09:15,080 --> 01:09:15,960 Yes, it is. 802 01:09:18,960 --> 01:09:22,539 - Are you going to stay? - I think I owe it to myself. 804 01:09:22,899 --> 01:09:23,840 Oh? 805 01:09:24,960 --> 01:09:26,099 I'm gonna stick around. 806 01:09:26,440 --> 01:09:29,779 See if there's anything about the son of a bitch I can admire. 807 01:09:37,000 --> 01:09:38,439 Come on, come on. 808 01:09:39,520 --> 01:09:43,500 Hi there, how are you? Dr. Petrelli there? Oh, damn it. 811 01:09:43,700 --> 01:09:48,000 Well, how long ago did she leave? Yeah, no. No message. Thank you. 812 01:09:52,000 --> 01:09:53,000 Hi. 01:09:56,000 --> 01:10:00,899 Look, about last night, I guess I, um, flew off the handle and I said a few things. 01:10:01,100 --> 01:10:06,699 - Anything you said was true, Jud. - Then why did you let it happen? 01:10:07,800 --> 01:10:12,699 Well, unfortunately, I have never given one damn where a situation might end up. 01:10:12,800 --> 01:10:15,699 Last night I overdid it. 01:10:15,800 --> 01:10:19,699 Why is it with you that everything has to have a punchline? 01:10:19,800 --> 01:10:22,699 Because anybody can say the straight lines. And God, I'm tired. 01:10:22,800 --> 01:10:24,699 - If we're gonna talk about it, let's do it later. - No, let's just forget it. 01:10:24,800 --> 01:10:27,699 Oh, fine. We'll forget it while you answer the door. Thank you very much. 813 01:10:35,520 --> 01:10:39,420 Listen, I have this fantastic offer. You get these fresh bagels and loxs absolutely free, 814 01:10:39,520 --> 01:10:43,260 and all you have to do is support me for the rest of my life. Oh, my God, you look awful. 815 01:10:43,380 --> 01:10:45,619 What orgy were you at last night, and why wasn't I invited? 01:10:45,780 --> 01:10:49,119 Well, you wouldn't have liked it anyhow, love. It was badly organized. 01:10:49,380 --> 01:10:51,119 Not enough coat hangers. 816 01:10:53,239 --> 01:10:55,380 Actually, I spent the night with a bunch of old goats 01:10:55,580 --> 01:10:57,680 who'd love to remember what an orgy was. 817 01:11:00,920 --> 01:11:05,779 Hey, Father, do you ever see any of your dependents anymore? 818 01:11:06,079 --> 01:11:06,539 Uh, what? 819 01:11:06,679 --> 01:11:09,520 Oh, you know, those out-of-work actors and directors 01:11:09,779 --> 01:11:11,520 you used to hire every time you got a show to produce. 820 01:11:11,760 --> 01:11:12,779 You ever see any of them? 821 01:11:13,100 --> 01:11:15,300 Well, I try to keep in touch, yeah. 822 01:11:15,579 --> 01:11:18,579 Why? I mean, none of them had any talent, did they? 01:11:18,779 --> 01:11:21,579 Yeah, well, if you go through life choosing only talented friends, son, 01:11:21,779 --> 01:11:24,579 you may end up very lonely. 824 01:11:38,920 --> 01:11:42,000 - How are you, Jud? Good to see you again. - Hiya, Gladys. 827 01:11:42,220 --> 01:11:45,660 Well, I want you to know that this is the first time I have ever provided 01:11:45,820 --> 01:11:46,960 - a pickup and delivery service. - Yeah, yeah. 828 01:11:47,179 --> 01:11:49,659 What do you guys eat when I'm not around here? There is no milk, no sugar, no butter. 01:11:49,859 --> 01:11:51,859 Sally Haines, this is Dr. Petrelli. 829 01:11:51,939 --> 01:11:53,260 Look, why don't you run around the corner, huh? 830 01:11:53,279 --> 01:11:54,679 To the market on the corner of 72nd. 831 01:11:54,820 --> 01:11:56,040 - Get whatever you need. - Okay, sure. 832 01:11:56,279 --> 01:11:58,560 Um, uh, you set the table. Be'll back about ten minutes. 833 01:11:59,960 --> 01:12:03,420 Oh, you won't believe this, but my good ankle is still swollen. 834 01:12:03,880 --> 01:12:04,479 You are ready? 835 01:12:04,800 --> 01:12:06,420 I'm not going to any hospital, Gladys. 836 01:12:07,100 --> 01:12:09,279 Scottie, we went all over that last night. 837 01:12:09,380 --> 01:12:10,460 Let's not start again. 838 01:12:10,479 --> 01:12:12,579 Let's not, because this time my mind is made up. 839 01:12:12,640 --> 01:12:15,260 Scottie, don't be stupid. We are talking about your life. 840 01:12:15,420 --> 01:12:17,260 Exactly. It is my life, isn't this? 841 01:12:19,159 --> 01:12:23,000 Let's just for an uncharacteristic moment discuss the quality of that life. 01:12:23,159 --> 01:12:25,500 Do you remember Joe Sapstead? 01:12:25,709 --> 01:12:27,900 A little roly-poly guy. Had a face like a Campbell's soup kid. 01:12:28,159 --> 01:12:31,700 You remember him? Well, anyway. He let them treat him and in two months 01:12:31,909 --> 01:12:36,000 they had reduced him to a, God, a stumbling old man. 01:12:36,259 --> 01:12:38,000 It was, oh he's still alive, they said, yeah. 01:12:38,159 --> 01:12:41,000 Well they didn't convince me because that wasn't him. It wasn't Joe. 01:12:41,859 --> 01:12:47,000 That was an entirely different case. Joe Sapstead had a brain tumor. 01:12:47,159 --> 01:12:48,600 What the hell is the difference what he had, Gladys? 01:12:48,859 --> 01:12:50,600 Are you gonna promise me I don't end up that way? 01:12:50,859 --> 01:12:55,000 - I am going to promise to give you time. - For what? Jesus Christ. 01:12:55,159 --> 01:12:57,500 I don't have some unfinished concerto in there, do I? 01:12:57,659 --> 01:13:01,800 I'm not on the verge of some great discovery. I'm not even in the middle of a good angle. 01:13:01,959 --> 01:13:04,000 Scottie, I'm not going to stand by and let you die. 01:13:04,159 --> 01:13:06,000 Oh, Jesus, you're determined to depress me, aren't you? 01:13:06,159 --> 01:13:09,000 - I'm trying to save you! - Goddammit, will you give me a break? 842 01:13:12,000 --> 01:13:17,600 Gladys, I... I don't want to sit around and bore everyone to death. My God! 01:13:17,800 --> 01:13:22,000 Who wants to leave an audience wanting less? You can understand that one, can't you? 843 01:13:24,000 --> 01:13:27,500 I've lost all the prelims. Maybe I can win the main event. 844 01:13:28,000 --> 01:13:30,700 And Jesus, that line looked better in my head than it sounded. 845 01:13:31,000 --> 01:13:33,000 What the hell are you talking about? 846 01:13:34,000 --> 01:13:36,000 You know, this isn't one of those dumb movies that you wrote. 01:13:36,200 --> 01:13:38,000 Do I criticize your work? 847 01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:42,000 - What about your son? - Oh, Jesus, let me tell you something, baby. 848 01:13:43,000 --> 01:13:45,840 Every now and then, Gladys, you just have to cut your losses and run. 849 01:13:48,119 --> 01:13:49,560 All right, Scottie. 850 01:13:50,060 --> 01:13:51,619 Exactly what do you plan to do? 851 01:13:51,939 --> 01:13:54,260 I'm trying not to think about it, Gladys. 852 01:13:54,300 --> 01:13:54,680 Then what? 853 01:13:55,260 --> 01:13:57,180 Then I'm going to make a nice, clean exit. 854 01:13:57,340 --> 01:13:57,979 How? 855 01:13:58,300 --> 01:13:58,979 Yeah. 856 01:14:00,140 --> 01:14:03,920 Well, I was rather hoping that you'd provide me with a handy little escape kit. 857 01:14:05,020 --> 01:14:06,619 No? Well, what the hell. 858 01:14:10,000 --> 01:14:10,520 Scottie? 859 01:14:13,340 --> 01:14:18,000 I think it's about time that someone told you that there is a fine line 01:14:18,240 --> 01:14:21,000 between being a living legend and a horse's ass. 860 01:14:21,260 --> 01:14:23,720 Jesus Christ, I love it when you get philosophical. 861 01:14:24,060 --> 01:14:27,180 - Don't do this to me, Scottie. - Listen, please, will you? I love you. 863 01:14:27,619 --> 01:14:31,500 I think the biggest regret of my life is that you never officially adopted me, all right? 864 01:14:31,920 --> 01:14:35,659 But damn it, it's time I grew up and took charge of my own life. 865 01:14:35,779 --> 01:14:36,180 Scottie! 866 01:14:36,239 --> 01:14:37,479 The answer is no. 867 01:14:39,619 --> 01:14:40,420 Look at me. 868 01:14:41,079 --> 01:14:42,420 I mean it. No. 869 01:14:53,000 --> 01:14:56,520 Don't look so gloomy. May still take a beer. 870 01:15:28,020 --> 01:15:32,260 Hey, Lady! That's an illegal U-turn you just made there. 871 01:15:32,720 --> 01:15:36,100 - And now it's a fire hydrant. - And I'm a doctor. 01:16:14,720 --> 01:16:16,900 I told you. I'm a doctor. 873 01:16:18,039 --> 01:16:21,359 Right. I'm a cop. Have a nice day. 874 01:16:25,000 --> 01:16:28,500 - What was that all about? - I really don't want to talk about it. 01:16:28,700 --> 01:16:30,100 Are you going to tell me what's going on this morning? 01:16:30,300 --> 01:16:33,000 Knock it off. Okay? 875 01:16:36,000 --> 01:16:38,000 Okay. 876 01:16:49,200 --> 01:16:52,339 Look, I'm sorry. 877 01:16:53,140 --> 01:16:56,260 I'm very hassled this morning. I didn't mean to take it out on you. 879 01:16:57,020 --> 01:17:00,079 You know, if this thing between us is going to work out, 01:17:00,220 --> 01:17:03,079 you're going to have to start kissing back. 881 01:17:06,680 --> 01:17:09,079 Last night, after I left you, 882 01:17:10,359 --> 01:17:13,979 I walked in on my father and mother. 883 01:17:14,539 --> 01:17:16,380 Together. 884 01:17:16,720 --> 01:17:22,080 Well, you mean together or, uh, together? 885 01:17:22,840 --> 01:17:24,900 Forget it, Sally. Just forget it. 886 01:17:29,020 --> 01:17:32,100 Why are you so uptight? You know how affectionate Scottie is. 888 01:17:32,500 --> 01:17:36,220 If he's so damn affectionate, why the hell did I stutter for five years? 890 01:17:37,579 --> 01:17:40,399 - Didn't you ever like him, Jud? - Liked him? 892 01:17:40,600 --> 01:17:43,180 I adored him. I mean, why not? 894 01:17:43,379 --> 01:17:45,960 It was like having an eight-year-old playmate as a permanent house guest. 895 01:17:46,079 --> 01:17:46,800 Then what happened? 896 01:17:47,539 --> 01:17:48,880 He moved to a different neighborhood. 897 01:17:49,619 --> 01:17:52,100 Jud, that was a long time ago. Why are you so bitter? 898 01:17:54,180 --> 01:17:56,779 You're right. It was a long time ago. 899 01:17:58,760 --> 01:17:59,899 You're doing it again! 900 01:18:02,840 --> 01:18:03,239 Jud! 901 01:18:04,859 --> 01:18:05,859 I don't get it. 902 01:18:05,979 --> 01:18:07,739 How is anyone going to find out about it? 903 01:18:09,380 --> 01:18:09,819 Jesus. 904 01:18:10,920 --> 01:18:11,779 You're just like him. 905 01:18:12,939 --> 01:18:13,640 Oh, come on. 906 01:18:13,699 --> 01:18:17,159 We'd all like to live a neat, ordered, happy ever-after life. 907 01:18:17,220 --> 01:18:18,619 But it just doesn't work out that way. 908 01:18:18,760 --> 01:18:20,960 Sometimes human impulses screw us out. 909 01:18:21,300 --> 01:18:24,000 I don't understand that sort of morality. 910 01:18:27,000 --> 01:18:30,820 You know, I have a feeling that we are never gonna finish a meal together. 01:18:31,100 --> 01:18:33,820 I can't be dishonest just because I wanna go to bed with you. 01:18:34,000 --> 01:18:38,820 Trust me to get mixed up with an idealist. You know our problem, Jud? You're too old for me. 01:18:40,000 --> 01:18:43,720 Look, I doubt we'll be seeing each other again, but if we do, let's make a pact, huh? 01:18:44,200 --> 01:18:46,420 Eat first, talk later. 01:19:55,600 --> 01:19:56,920 - You okay, kid? - What? 912 01:19:59,020 --> 01:20:00,460 I didn't know you could play. 913 01:20:05,380 --> 01:20:07,279 My father's probably upstairs. 01:20:07,480 --> 01:20:10,079 Well, I wanted to see you. I wanted to talk to you about him. 914 01:20:12,199 --> 01:20:14,720 You know about my father? 01:20:17,199 --> 01:20:19,720 Let's get some fresh air. Come on. 915 01:20:24,399 --> 01:20:27,520 Gladys tells me you don't want to help get Scottie into the hospital. 916 01:20:28,039 --> 01:20:31,060 She phoned me right after she left you. 917 01:20:32,680 --> 01:20:33,539 I see. 918 01:20:33,919 --> 01:20:37,919 Well, I don't. I don't understand why I'd have to hit Scottie. 920 01:20:38,499 --> 01:20:42,079 I don't understand why I had to lose my wife five years ago. 921 01:20:42,640 --> 01:20:47,519 I don't understand anything anymore. Mostly, Jud, I don't understand you. 922 01:20:47,960 --> 01:20:54,359 My father doesn't like pain, discomfort in any form. If he wants to avoid it, why shouldn't he? 923 01:20:54,680 --> 01:20:56,819 Well, that explains him. What about you? 924 01:20:58,899 --> 01:21:00,420 I respect his decision. 925 01:21:02,239 --> 01:21:06,199 Suddenly, you got respect. 926 01:21:12,220 --> 01:21:14,300 Is my father good at his job? 01:21:14,720 --> 01:21:17,700 - What kind of a question... - Is my father good at his job? 01:21:18,920 --> 01:21:24,300 Well let me tell you about your father. Your father's a man who misused his talents. 01:21:24,520 --> 01:21:28,000 He's avoided responsibility all his life. He's never been a fan of hard work. 01:21:28,220 --> 01:21:31,800 He's lopsed up every chance he's ever had. He's squandered his money. 01:21:32,220 --> 01:21:35,700 But there's never been a time where I didn't look forward to seeing him. 01:21:36,220 --> 01:21:40,000 And there are hundreds of people just feel the same way I do. 927 01:21:42,000 --> 01:21:44,779 What you're saying is my father is a crowd pleaser. 01:21:44,900 --> 01:21:45,979 Exactly. 928 01:21:47,159 --> 01:21:49,779 I wish to God there were few more like him. 929 01:21:51,159 --> 01:21:55,859 Mr. Daniels, there has got to be more to my father than that. 930 01:21:56,880 --> 01:22:03,539 Jud, your father has the enormous gift of taking a hamburger 01:22:03,880 --> 01:22:07,539 and making everybody around them feel like they've been at a banquet. 01:22:08,480 --> 01:22:12,139 Now if you don't think that that's a great reason for living, 01:22:12,780 --> 01:22:16,539 boy, there's something wrong with your sense of values. 931 01:22:19,819 --> 01:22:21,500 It's worth saving, Jud. 932 01:22:28,000 --> 01:22:31,399 - Cheers! Cheers, cheers, cheers. - Jesus, Scottie. 01:22:31,600 --> 01:22:33,399 Now, you look a little odd to me, pal. 01:22:33,600 --> 01:22:35,799 I always look this way when my heart stops. What the hell are you doing, Scottie? 01:22:36,000 --> 01:22:37,399 Holding a bottle of champagne. 01:22:37,600 --> 01:22:40,399 I find champagne and orange juice makes breakfast a little more festive. 01:22:40,600 --> 01:22:44,399 As for this bottle, I'll have you know it was given to me by an old admirer 01:22:44,600 --> 01:22:48,399 in return for my sexual favors, which is intended to give you a small idea 01:22:48,600 --> 01:22:50,399 as to just how old this little bottle really is. 933 01:22:50,539 --> 01:22:52,159 Give me some orange juice to go with this. 934 01:22:52,220 --> 01:22:54,319 Well, yeah, I'm going to call up some of my favorite degenerates. 935 01:22:54,460 --> 01:22:56,319 Orange juice and champagne coming up. 936 01:23:00,180 --> 01:23:01,560 I have to talk to you, Dad. 937 01:23:03,380 --> 01:23:07,439 I think I've had enough scenes for one morning. Thank you, Jud. 939 01:23:07,619 --> 01:23:08,380 You can't wait. 940 01:23:08,479 --> 01:23:09,039 Oh, yeah. 941 01:23:09,260 --> 01:23:10,159 Well, wait. 942 01:23:11,680 --> 01:23:13,479 I spoke with Dr. Petrelli. 943 01:23:15,560 --> 01:23:15,920 Oh. 944 01:23:18,640 --> 01:23:21,739 She tell you about my body all aching and racked with pain? 945 01:23:22,960 --> 01:23:23,439 No. 946 01:23:24,439 --> 01:23:25,500 Mother told me last night. 947 01:23:26,619 --> 01:23:30,880 You... I wish she hadn't done that. 948 01:23:33,399 --> 01:23:35,560 Naturally, I was very sorry to hear the news. 949 01:23:36,100 --> 01:23:38,119 Oh, my God, you sound like a Hallmark card. 950 01:23:38,359 --> 01:23:39,359 Sorry about that, too. 951 01:23:39,920 --> 01:23:41,960 Hey, tell me something. Is that why you decided to stay? 952 01:23:42,079 --> 01:23:42,779 It's one of the reasons? 953 01:23:43,579 --> 01:23:44,319 You needn't bother. 954 01:23:45,020 --> 01:23:46,500 You're gonna need all the help you can get. 955 01:23:46,619 --> 01:23:48,659 There is nothing that you can do, Jud. 956 01:23:48,920 --> 01:23:51,140 For one thing, I can get you to a hospital. 957 01:23:51,640 --> 01:23:55,840 You can get... You made your token gesture, and goddammit, that did it. 958 01:23:56,239 --> 01:23:58,060 Listen to this good. I'm only gonna say it once. 959 01:23:58,140 --> 01:24:01,180 I can't think of one damn reason for me to change my mind. 960 01:24:01,399 --> 01:24:01,859 I can. 961 01:24:02,020 --> 01:24:02,359 Can you? 962 01:24:02,560 --> 01:24:02,939 Yes. 963 01:24:03,399 --> 01:24:05,699 You owe it to me to stick around as long as you can. 964 01:24:05,979 --> 01:24:08,880 I didn't know that you held any of my unpaid markers, kid. 965 01:24:09,680 --> 01:24:11,979 Do you know what you said about me last night? 966 01:24:12,720 --> 01:24:13,899 Even if you were justified, 967 01:24:14,079 --> 01:24:17,140 I can only tell you that it did not fill me with parental affection. 968 01:24:17,699 --> 01:24:20,000 Get off my back here and stay off it. 969 01:24:20,659 --> 01:24:20,960 No. 970 01:24:21,680 --> 01:24:25,600 You have walked away from every responsibility you've ever had. 01:24:26,380 --> 01:24:28,000 Well, I'm not gonna let you walk away from this one. 01:24:28,180 --> 01:24:31,000 No, no, no. I understand. Now, I'm gonna be suffused with guilt, right? 01:24:31,280 --> 01:24:34,500 Maybe I'll atone with some stupid, meaningless gesture, right? 01:24:35,880 --> 01:24:39,000 Well, it might just give you a little self-respect. 971 01:24:43,000 --> 01:24:47,920 This may come as a surprise to you, kid, but I am loaded with self-respect. 972 01:24:48,359 --> 01:24:48,920 All right, then. 973 01:24:49,460 --> 01:24:50,220 Do it for me. 974 01:24:50,600 --> 01:24:51,239 For you? 975 01:24:51,460 --> 01:24:51,939 Why? 976 01:24:52,380 --> 01:24:53,220 Because I need you. 977 01:24:53,420 --> 01:24:55,399 And when I needed you before, you weren't there. 978 01:24:55,760 --> 01:24:57,199 Well, God damn it, I need you now. 979 01:24:57,279 --> 01:24:59,900 - Where were you when I needed you? - What? 981 01:25:00,119 --> 01:25:02,159 Jesus, I guess there's no two-way street, is there? 982 01:25:02,260 --> 01:25:04,340 Where the hell were you when I was in the middle of the city, 01:25:04,560 --> 01:25:06,340 knocking my ass off, looking for a job? Where were you? 983 01:25:06,699 --> 01:25:10,159 Where have you been for two solid years, kid? Isn't that funny? 984 01:25:10,380 --> 01:25:13,040 I haven't seen you rushing madly to keep your old man company, I'll tell you. 01:25:13,280 --> 01:25:15,140 - You never insisted that I come. - It was your choice. 01:25:15,380 --> 01:25:16,640 - You shouldn't have given me a choice. - Stop it. 985 01:25:19,899 --> 01:25:22,380 My God in heaven, what are we doing? 986 01:25:35,319 --> 01:25:36,539 Okay, look. 987 01:25:38,220 --> 01:25:44,579 Let's just say that I'm not the father that you always wanted, all right? 989 01:25:47,020 --> 01:25:52,819 Has it occurred to you that you are not the son that I always wanted? 990 01:25:59,260 --> 01:26:01,359 I gotta ask you a question. It's driving me crazy. 992 01:26:01,860 --> 01:26:07,539 Did you ever, I mean in your entire life, did you ever do just one, you know, 993 01:26:07,720 --> 01:26:12,620 crazy, funny, spontaneous thing? Did you ever even try? 01:26:12,820 --> 01:26:15,920 - Somebody get this door. - I'm gonna tell you one thing, kid. 01:26:16,220 --> 01:26:19,220 If that's not comedy relief, we're both in a hell of a lot of trouble. 01:26:19,720 --> 01:26:21,320 Why don't you just go fuck yourself! 01:26:23,220 --> 01:26:24,220 That's spontaneous! 994 01:26:27,199 --> 01:26:29,800 Not very funny, but spontaneous. 995 01:26:30,720 --> 01:26:33,899 - Never get a job at the Savoy, Lou. - Hey, what happened to Jud? 997 01:26:34,539 --> 01:26:35,819 Oh, that's a very good question. 998 01:26:36,099 --> 01:26:36,800 Where the hell are you going? 999 01:26:37,079 --> 01:26:40,040 - I'm going to find some happy faces. - Will you mind if I come along? 1001 01:26:40,200 --> 01:26:41,920 Not if you bring a happy face. 01:27:33,000 --> 01:27:35,600 You had a chance talk with Jud this morning? 01:27:35,800 --> 01:27:37,920 We don´t have talks. We just have interviews. 01:27:38,200 --> 01:27:40,020 - Interviews? - I don't know. I think the kid is giving me 01:27:40,200 --> 01:27:42,920 a test on my life and the best I can hope for is a C-minus. 01:27:44,200 --> 01:27:45,920 Well, at least you got a passing grade. 1002 01:27:48,239 --> 01:27:51,560 Lewis, Lewis, how many times must I tell you you can't go through life 01:27:51,739 --> 01:27:52,960 treating everything as a joke? 1003 01:28:03,439 --> 01:28:05,119 Interesting prop. 1004 01:28:05,340 --> 01:28:06,860 - It's yours. - Mm-hmm. 1006 01:28:07,659 --> 01:28:09,479 For the hospital. 1007 01:28:11,899 --> 01:28:12,839 Oh. 1008 01:28:13,619 --> 01:28:16,180 Now, what is that supposed to prove, Jud? 1009 01:28:18,640 --> 01:28:21,420 - We need some time. - Why? 1011 01:28:22,000 --> 01:28:25,760 Because I'm not ready to cry over you yet. 01:32:38,000 --> 01:32:39,760 Uh, excuse me. 1012 01:32:40,579 --> 01:32:42,819 Is that a defect in the slide? 1013 01:32:43,079 --> 01:32:43,779 Not on the slide. 1014 01:32:43,960 --> 01:32:46,539 Oh, no, that's... Okay, you can go ahead. 1015 01:32:50,779 --> 01:32:51,920 They're marvelous, Jud. 1016 01:32:55,399 --> 01:32:56,279 Should I stop? 1017 01:32:56,520 --> 01:32:59,220 No, no, don't... Don't turn them off. I'd like to see them. 1019 01:33:02,159 --> 01:33:02,819 That's nice. 1020 01:33:07,359 --> 01:33:09,159 I guess we should congratulate ourselves. 1021 01:33:10,779 --> 01:33:11,319 Why? 1022 01:33:13,560 --> 01:33:16,979 The way we've managed to avoid each other for the past three months. 1023 01:33:22,800 --> 01:33:26,719 Look. I owe you an apology. 1025 01:33:27,360 --> 01:33:29,039 I had no right to judge your life. 01:33:36,360 --> 01:33:38,039 You look tired, Jud. 1027 01:33:38,340 --> 01:33:44,500 Yes, well, this sort of experience tends to mature a person. 1028 01:33:47,000 --> 01:33:48,699 I like that one. 1029 01:33:52,699 --> 01:33:54,399 How are things with you and Scottie? 1030 01:33:58,000 --> 01:34:04,399 I had this idea that by objectively studying the photographs I took of him...... 01:34:05,000 --> 01:34:08,399 well, I'd be able to bring him into focus. 1031 01:34:10,539 --> 01:34:11,819 But you know my father. 1032 01:34:12,880 --> 01:34:14,680 A master of disguise. 1033 01:34:17,819 --> 01:34:20,079 Look, you use what you have. 1034 01:34:21,359 --> 01:34:26,400 As you know, I've never been very good at making contact. 01:34:26,959 --> 01:34:31,400 Oh, Jud, you don't have to reach out to Scottie. He's got his arms out to the whole world. 01:34:31,659 --> 01:34:33,600 I'm not the whole world. I'm his son. 1035 01:34:36,000 --> 01:34:39,000 Then... then what do you want from him? 1036 01:34:40,000 --> 01:34:42,000 Something more. 1037 01:34:44,000 --> 01:34:45,500 I don't know. 1038 01:34:46,840 --> 01:34:48,439 My father may be right. 1039 01:34:48,960 --> 01:34:51,239 I'm a very peculiar chap. 1040 01:34:51,600 --> 01:34:52,920 Tell me about it. 1041 01:34:57,560 --> 01:34:58,539 Oh, Kyle. 1042 01:34:58,920 --> 01:34:59,420 We're late. 1043 01:35:02,859 --> 01:35:04,140 It's terrific, Jud. 1044 01:35:04,159 --> 01:35:04,960 It's just terrific. 1045 01:35:05,500 --> 01:35:08,260 - You know how he likes surprises. - Do you think he suspects anything? 01:35:08,400 --> 01:35:10,460 No, not a thing. And he's very testy, 01:35:10,600 --> 01:35:12,760 because he thinks nobody's remembered that it's his birthday. 01:35:15,700 --> 01:35:17,760 - I've got his present right here. - Oh, what'd you get him? 01:35:18,000 --> 01:35:20,760 - Shh, another hat. What else? - Oh. 01:35:20,900 --> 01:35:22,760 Well, you better not give it to him 'til tonight. 01:35:22,900 --> 01:35:25,760 If he thinks he's remembered, he might suspect something. 1046 01:35:36,260 --> 01:35:37,960 I want an honest opinion. 1047 01:35:41,380 --> 01:35:43,079 Does this tie go with this suit? 1048 01:35:44,779 --> 01:35:48,180 It's perfect, but only if you carry a horn. 1049 01:35:48,579 --> 01:35:55,000 Oh, Sally, do you happen to know what today's date is by any... 1050 01:35:56,479 --> 01:35:58,899 I think it's the 9th, isn't it? 1051 01:35:58,960 --> 01:36:05,880 It is the 9th. I said no reason to ask. I was just wondering if it was really the 9th. 1052 01:36:12,119 --> 01:36:13,840 He's exactly the same, isn't he? 1053 01:36:14,739 --> 01:36:15,739 Only more soft. 1054 01:36:18,779 --> 01:36:19,819 He's in remission. 1055 01:36:20,680 --> 01:36:23,220 Remission? How long will that last? 1056 01:36:23,800 --> 01:36:26,939 Well, it's hard to tell. Years. Many years if we get lucky. 1057 01:36:29,439 --> 01:36:30,239 Can I talk? 1058 01:36:30,479 --> 01:36:31,560 Yeah, he's upstairs. 1059 01:36:32,479 --> 01:36:33,720 Okay, everything's all set. 1060 01:36:34,100 --> 01:36:35,659 I've been to the airport six times today. 1061 01:36:35,939 --> 01:36:38,199 I got 50 people stashing hotels all over town. 1062 01:36:38,880 --> 01:36:40,899 Oh, yeah, and your mother's plane was late, but she'll be here. 1063 01:36:41,140 --> 01:36:41,460 Okay. 1064 01:36:41,600 --> 01:36:44,700 I want you kids to be out of here within 15 minutes, okay? 01:36:44,900 --> 01:36:46,000 Where the hell are my phone calls? 1065 01:36:47,260 --> 01:36:47,819 I don't know. 1066 01:36:47,880 --> 01:36:50,779 For three months, that thing rings like a Miss America or something, 1067 01:36:50,880 --> 01:36:52,060 and then certainly it stops. 1068 01:36:52,340 --> 01:36:53,239 What do you expect? 1069 01:36:53,319 --> 01:36:54,479 You double-crossed everybody. 1070 01:36:54,579 --> 01:36:55,180 You're a lie. 1071 01:36:55,560 --> 01:36:57,859 Oh, well, I hate foul-weather friends. 1072 01:36:58,140 --> 01:37:00,000 Doesn't anybody else feel chilly in here? 1073 01:37:00,300 --> 01:37:02,019 Somebody throw a hot starlight over me. 01:37:02,200 --> 01:37:04,819 I am not a starlight, but maybe I will do until the real thing comes along. 1074 01:37:05,699 --> 01:37:07,680 How are you, baby? You know something, I swear. 1075 01:37:08,039 --> 01:37:10,720 Somewhere along the line, a piece of me fell off and became you. 1076 01:37:11,079 --> 01:37:12,460 What are you doing all dressed up? 1077 01:37:12,739 --> 01:37:14,640 You're working dads, and I gotta go. 1078 01:37:14,760 --> 01:37:16,560 What are you going to? Aren't you going to stay and play with me? 1079 01:37:16,600 --> 01:37:20,479 Oh, I'd like to, Scottie, but I've got to bring a little sunshine into the lives of 5,000 Shriners. 1080 01:37:20,560 --> 01:37:22,640 What are you with 5,000 Shrines? Don't I get sunshine? 1081 01:37:22,939 --> 01:37:24,880 Sorry, Scottie, but the needy come first. 1082 01:37:27,479 --> 01:37:29,760 Oh, the needy come first. 1083 01:37:32,520 --> 01:37:38,380 Psst, kid, you know, if I were you, I would hang on to that girl very, very tightly. 1084 01:37:38,500 --> 01:37:42,960 That damn phone hasn't been so quiet since I mistook Xanax's wife for a hired party girl. 1085 01:37:44,119 --> 01:37:46,000 - Hey, wait a minute. Maybe it's out of order. - Yeah, well, wait a minute. 01:37:46,219 --> 01:37:50,000 I'll check it out upstairs. I got a few calls to make anyway. 01:37:56,219 --> 01:37:58,400 Well, uh, when does your plane leave, son? 1086 01:38:00,000 --> 01:38:01,560 I'm catching the red-eye. 1087 01:38:06,820 --> 01:38:12,500 Jud, I, uh... I'm sorry that it wasn't more fun for you, kid. 1088 01:38:14,840 --> 01:38:18,479 Well, I didn't stay because I was looking for fun, Dad. 1090 01:38:21,100 --> 01:38:22,479 Why did you stay, Jud? 1091 01:38:24,560 --> 01:38:28,140 I wanted to pay you back for all those endless hours on the miniature golf course. 1092 01:38:28,880 --> 01:38:30,399 Listen, I'll catch you later, Dad. 1093 01:38:30,520 --> 01:38:30,800 Huh? 1094 01:38:31,039 --> 01:38:34,100 Maybe we'll down a few beers and grab a couple of chorus girls. 1095 01:38:34,739 --> 01:38:35,840 Or should it be the other way around? 1096 01:38:38,880 --> 01:38:39,640 Good way. 1097 01:38:44,840 --> 01:38:45,979 Hello? 1098 01:38:47,060 --> 01:38:49,000 I'm gonna check that damn phone. 1099 01:39:00,840 --> 01:39:01,319 Operate? 1100 01:39:02,960 --> 01:39:03,479 Working. 1101 01:39:04,300 --> 01:39:06,000 Well, you ready to go back to work, kid? 1102 01:39:08,000 --> 01:39:09,400 What's the matter, Scottie? 01:39:09,600 --> 01:39:12,000 - Do you know what today's date is? - No. 01:39:12,300 --> 01:39:15,000 - It's the 9th. - So? 1103 01:39:19,700 --> 01:39:21,500 Tell me, sir, how's your sex life? 01:39:22,700 --> 01:39:24,500 I could say it was meager, but I'd be bragging. 01:39:24,700 --> 01:39:28,000 Well, how come you broke up with your last girlfriend? Speak right into the microphone. 01:39:28,200 --> 01:39:30,400 - I remeber she was rotten. - What do you mean rotten? 01:39:30,600 --> 01:39:31,900 I'll tell you how rotten she was. 01:39:32,100 --> 01:39:35,000 Whenever anyone in the whole world is rotten, she gets a royalty. 1104 01:39:37,900 --> 01:39:38,779 What's wrong, Scottie? 01:39:38,900 --> 01:39:43,479 I think we started out as the odd couple, and suddenly we're turning into the sunshine. 01:39:43,700 --> 01:39:44,779 I think you're going to be depressing. I'm going. 01:39:44,970 --> 01:39:46,779 You what? You can't leave me all alone. 1105 01:39:47,000 --> 01:39:49,220 You won't whine, will you, Scottie? Nobody likes a whiner. 1107 01:39:49,420 --> 01:39:50,840 - A whiner? - Maybe I'll drop by later 1108 01:39:51,099 --> 01:39:52,939 - and we'll play some gin. - Gin? 1110 01:39:52,979 --> 01:39:53,560 I'll see you later. 1111 01:39:53,699 --> 01:39:54,180 Whoopi! 1112 01:39:54,300 --> 01:39:54,739 I'll see you. 1113 01:39:55,359 --> 01:39:55,619 Bye. 1114 01:39:56,680 --> 01:39:57,180 See you. 1115 01:40:00,420 --> 01:40:01,419 Hello. 1116 01:40:04,640 --> 01:40:11,000 Happy birthday to me. Happy... I'm gonna check that damn phone again. 1117 01:40:22,000 --> 01:40:28,619 Gin. Oh, hello. Uh, Hi there. How are you? 01:40:28,800 --> 01:40:32,319 Yeah, well, I'm gonna have to put a little damper on that one, love, 01:40:32,500 --> 01:40:38,619 because I have to report a serious malfunction, you know, with the instrument thing. 01:40:38,800 --> 01:40:42,619 I have not had one call all morning. Now, how do you like them apples? 01:40:43,800 --> 01:40:47,619 Oh, the Naked Dixieland jazz band just arrived. I'll call you later. 01:40:47,800 --> 01:40:53,619 Hot damn one bill of the stairway up you climb. Kiss your ankle from inside. 01:40:56,400 --> 01:40:59,819 - Hello? - Uh, Mr. Scott Templeton? 01:41:00,200 --> 01:41:02,619 - Uh, yeah. - Oh, well, I'm ever so glad of that, sir. 01:41:02,800 --> 01:41:03,619 I tend to get lost. 01:41:03,839 --> 01:41:05,060 I'm your nurse. 01:41:05,239 --> 01:41:07,860 - Where should I put these things? - My nurse? What? Just don't put anything. 01:41:08,039 --> 01:41:09,460 Who sends you? 1119 01:41:09,700 --> 01:41:13,880 Doctor Gladys Petrelli. She is your doctor, isn't she? 01:41:14,100 --> 01:41:16,380 Yeah, I don't quite. I don't need a nurse. 01:41:16,700 --> 01:41:19,380 - Yeah, well, she said you did. - Well, she said wrong. 01:41:19,700 --> 01:41:22,380 Oh, well, you are Mr...Scott? 01:41:22,600 --> 01:41:23,680 - Templeton. - That's you. 1120 01:41:23,879 --> 01:41:25,460 We just went through the whole damn thing. 1121 01:41:25,600 --> 01:41:27,220 Now, why do I look like I need a nurse? 1122 01:41:28,239 --> 01:41:32,619 Well, I'm not qualified to give a medical opinion, sir. 1123 01:41:32,739 --> 01:41:34,020 Oh, for God's sake. 1124 01:41:34,960 --> 01:41:36,979 I just go where they send me, sir. 1125 01:41:37,000 --> 01:41:38,439 Well, they sent you to the wrong place. 1126 01:41:39,199 --> 01:41:40,319 Oh, God! 1127 01:41:42,500 --> 01:41:44,260 I needed this job, sir. 1128 01:41:44,479 --> 01:41:46,220 I counted on this job. 1129 01:41:46,579 --> 01:41:47,979 Don't touch me person, sir. 1130 01:41:48,159 --> 01:41:49,939 This is humiliating is what it is. 1131 01:41:50,140 --> 01:41:54,619 I'm a trained practical nurse and I shouldn't have to beg for nothing. 1132 01:41:55,000 --> 01:41:57,899 Do you have a Kleenex, sir? This thing is all balled up. 1133 01:41:58,539 --> 01:41:59,420 Use my hand. 1134 01:42:00,260 --> 01:42:01,779 I'm terribly sorry, sir. 1135 01:42:01,880 --> 01:42:03,520 I don't normally act this way. 1136 01:42:03,840 --> 01:42:07,439 It's just that I've been having problems in my personal life. Can this thing be laundered, sir? 1137 01:42:07,679 --> 01:42:08,640 Give it to me. 1138 01:42:09,840 --> 01:42:10,960 Yeah, have a drink. 1139 01:42:11,279 --> 01:42:14,000 A drink? Oh, no, sir. I'm not supposed to drink on duty. 1140 01:42:14,119 --> 01:42:15,180 Yeah, well, I won't tell if you are. 1141 01:42:15,359 --> 01:42:19,779 - Oh, I won't tell, sir. - Look, I'm sorry if I see... 01:42:25,359 --> 01:42:29,279 Look, I'm sorry if I upset you before. I'm just in a rotten mood today. 01:42:29,459 --> 01:42:30,879 Well, is it something to do with your condition? 01:42:31,059 --> 01:42:32,279 Oh, no, no. 01:42:33,959 --> 01:42:36,779 Oh, hell. It's my birthday. 1144 01:42:37,560 --> 01:42:38,520 It's your birthday. 1145 01:42:38,800 --> 01:42:43,640 I think I'm the only human being on Earth that's aware of it, but it is my birthday. 1146 01:42:44,180 --> 01:42:50,219 - Oh, sir. It's your birthday. - That's what I just said. It's my birthday. 1148 01:42:50,420 --> 01:42:53,300 Well, birthdays are very, very important, sir. 1149 01:42:53,960 --> 01:42:56,119 Well, never you mind, though. 1150 01:42:56,340 --> 01:42:58,979 We'll just have to make do, sir, won't we? 1151 01:42:59,340 --> 01:43:01,100 Do, we will make do, sir. 1152 01:43:01,199 --> 01:43:03,739 You'll see, you're just gonna love it to pieces, sir. 1153 01:43:04,000 --> 01:43:10,199 Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. Yes, sir. 01:43:11,000 --> 01:43:16,199 I hope these are all right, sir. They were when last I looked. 01:43:16,400 --> 01:43:17,699 What are you doing? 01:43:18,300 --> 01:43:21,799 I don't want you to think that I do this for everybody, sir, because I don't. 01:43:22,000 --> 01:43:27,499 - I mean, happy birthday, sir. - Jesus! What the hell kind of a nurse 01:43:27,700 --> 01:43:33,199 comes in here, just starts whipping out her lung watch in the middle of my... 1154 01:43:38,880 --> 01:43:41,880 - Excuse me. - Charlotte. 01:43:44,180 --> 01:43:45,880 My God, that's Hillary. Is that? 01:43:46,180 --> 01:43:49,880 That's Hillary! That's her? That's her? It's Hillary! 1155 01:43:51,979 --> 01:43:54,260 Put that girl down, you don't know where she's been. 01:43:54,479 --> 01:43:59,060 - We've got it all, we've got it all on our tape! - Oh, you're in. You dirty son of a guy. 01:43:59,279 --> 01:44:01,060 - Happy birthday, pal. - I knew you would. 01:44:01,279 --> 01:44:03,860 If you're fine with what we got you, you must owe that at him. 01:44:04,079 --> 01:44:07,460 Well, we thought that you'd like her better than a ship with a clock in the middle of it. 01:44:07,679 --> 01:44:10,460 - And that's only the beginning. - Don't tell me you were in on this. 01:44:10,679 --> 01:44:12,760 First, I had to promise I wouldn't form the vice part. 01:44:12,979 --> 01:44:16,460 It was all Lou's idea. I brought the costume and the wig and Hillary brought everything else. 01:44:16,679 --> 01:44:19,460 - We got a limousine waiting outside. - I'll go to get my camera. 01:44:19,679 --> 01:44:21,760 Wait to see whereas we have plans that you no realize. 01:44:21,979 --> 01:44:24,460 Wait a minute, you guys. I still gotta get changed. 1157 01:44:24,660 --> 01:44:26,779 - You go ahead, Dad. I'll be right there. - What are you going to do? 1158 01:44:26,940 --> 01:44:28,260 My birthday. I get to stay and watch. 1160 01:44:28,420 --> 01:44:30,439 We're on a very tight schedule. Can you get dressed in five minutes? 1162 01:44:31,340 --> 01:44:32,100 Is he kidding? 1163 01:44:35,420 --> 01:44:35,819 Jesus. 1164 01:44:37,960 --> 01:44:38,619 You're amazing. 1165 01:44:41,899 --> 01:44:46,279 That has to be the oldest gag in the world that I fell for. 1166 01:44:46,579 --> 01:44:48,100 You should have been an actress, love. 1167 01:44:48,279 --> 01:44:49,899 Oh, honey, I was. 1168 01:44:50,899 --> 01:44:52,520 Oh, God, I have missed you, baby. 1169 01:44:52,800 --> 01:44:54,399 Not as much as I missed you. 1170 01:44:54,640 --> 01:44:56,239 Oh, you say that to all the boys. 1171 01:44:56,539 --> 01:44:56,859 Uh-uh. 1172 01:44:57,319 --> 01:44:59,140 You will always be my favorite young. 1173 01:44:59,199 --> 01:45:00,920 Well, then you give me a kiss. 1174 01:45:01,020 --> 01:45:02,000 Right there. 1175 01:45:08,500 --> 01:45:12,760 - Hey. How are you holding up, kiddo? - Huh? 01:45:13,00 --> 01:45:15,960 Gladys Petrelli told me that you've been a bit under the weather. 01:45:16,200 --> 01:45:21,760 Wow, she told you that? That's funny. She told me I had cancer. 01:45:24,00 --> 01:45:25,760 Can you tell me why the hell we're laughing? 1176 01:45:25,979 --> 01:45:30,800 Oh, if you ever find anything better than laughing, you let me know. 1177 01:45:33,079 --> 01:45:34,939 Gathers it like old times, isn't it? 1178 01:45:35,420 --> 01:45:38,260 And, Jud, you know how many hours I have waited 01:45:38,460 --> 01:45:40,960 for this wonderful, lovely lady to get dressed? 1179 01:45:41,680 --> 01:45:44,380 You are the best friend that I have ever had, Scottie. 1180 01:45:44,479 --> 01:45:47,300 You may be the only real friend I've ever had. 1181 01:45:48,300 --> 01:45:49,899 You always treated me like a human being. 1182 01:45:50,239 --> 01:45:51,600 Never like a hustler. 1183 01:45:51,899 --> 01:45:52,960 You put out for everybody. 1184 01:45:53,340 --> 01:45:55,979 You give the same to everybody. 1185 01:45:56,560 --> 01:45:57,420 I mean that. 1186 01:45:57,859 --> 01:46:05,680 It doesn't matter whether it's a doorman or your wife or your family or a movie star 01:46:06,559 --> 01:46:07,680 or a hooker. 1187 01:46:08,380 --> 01:46:11,000 You give everybody exactly the same. 1188 01:46:11,760 --> 01:46:12,920 And that is really something. 1189 01:46:13,840 --> 01:46:16,939 Hey, hey, don't get embarrassed. I wouldn't say it if it wasn't true. 1191 01:46:17,680 --> 01:46:20,079 You are a very rare creature, Scottie. 1192 01:46:20,460 --> 01:46:27,899 You're a man with absolutely no order of priorities. 01:46:28,460 --> 01:46:35,899 Well, what do you think, sailor? Do I look respectable enough to be escorted to the ball? 01:46:37,860 --> 01:46:39,899 You look divine. 01:46:41,460 --> 01:46:44,899 - You go ahead. I'll be right down. - Okay. 1193 01:46:48,779 --> 01:46:50,739 Okay, okay. I'm coming. I'm coming. 1194 01:46:54,899 --> 01:47:04,840 Jud, do you agree with Hillary that I'm a man with absolutely no order of priorities? 1195 01:47:08,039 --> 01:47:10,539 She meant that as a compliment, Dad. 1196 01:47:14,119 --> 01:47:16,420 You don't really think it is, do you, son? 1197 01:47:19,539 --> 01:47:22,539 I guess I always wanted to be one of those priorities. 1198 01:47:27,619 --> 01:47:31,939 Is that the reason why you never really wanted to spend time with me? Is it? 1199 01:47:33,720 --> 01:47:34,300 Dad. 1201 01:47:36,099 --> 01:47:37,539 They're waiting. 1202 01:47:37,739 --> 01:47:42,500 Oh, God, don't patronize me. Not now. Just tell me, is that the reason? 1205 01:47:48,580 --> 01:47:49,500 Partly. 1206 01:47:52,840 --> 01:47:55,820 Mostly, I was... 01:48:00,340 --> 01:48:03,220 - I was jealous. - What? Jealous of what? 1208 01:48:03,460 --> 01:48:04,760 - You. - Why? 1210 01:48:05,840 --> 01:48:08,840 I always felt like such a clot around you. 1211 01:48:08,960 --> 01:48:12,059 - Oh, God, Jud. - You said I wasn't the son you always wanted. 1213 01:48:12,279 --> 01:48:15,319 - God, I didn't mean that, Jud. - I knew that. 1215 01:48:17,859 --> 01:48:19,239 I wanted to be. 1216 01:48:21,079 --> 01:48:22,060 Fantasied. 1217 01:48:26,520 --> 01:48:27,519 Anyway. 1218 01:48:28,720 --> 01:48:30,039 A couple of years ago, 1219 01:48:30,800 --> 01:48:34,920 I realized I could never be like you. 1220 01:48:36,779 --> 01:48:37,979 Well, you're wrong. 1221 01:48:39,340 --> 01:48:40,560 You're just like me. 1222 01:48:41,899 --> 01:48:45,239 You have never made an emotional commitment in your life either. 1223 01:48:46,239 --> 01:48:47,260 Ever. 1224 01:48:49,840 --> 01:48:53,159 But don't you be stricken, kid, because you're still young. 1225 01:48:55,500 --> 01:48:57,339 Oh, hell, well, come on now. 1226 01:48:58,399 --> 01:49:01,819 Would being a chip off the old block scare you that much? 1227 01:49:03,859 --> 01:49:04,800 I don't know. 1228 01:49:07,239 --> 01:49:10,000 I'm not really sure who you are. 01:49:29,539 --> 01:49:31,000 It's Jud's idea, Scottie. 1229 01:49:34,159 --> 01:49:35,880 He planned the rest of tonight, too. 1230 01:49:44,479 --> 01:49:47,920 I was trying to find a way to kick this thing off. 1231 01:49:48,340 --> 01:49:50,340 So I looked up the word tribute. 1232 01:49:51,079 --> 01:49:53,520 You know, it not only means to pay homage. 1233 01:49:54,300 --> 01:49:55,579 It also means a gift. 1234 01:49:56,340 --> 01:49:57,520 And that seemed fitting. 1235 01:49:58,899 --> 01:50:01,539 Because that's what Scottie's given to us all. 1236 01:50:02,300 --> 01:50:03,159 A gift of friendship. 1237 01:50:04,159 --> 01:50:05,239 A gift of laughter. 1238 01:50:06,619 --> 01:50:08,939 Well, that's why we're all here. 1239 01:50:09,800 --> 01:50:11,640 To pay tribute to Scottie. 1240 01:50:12,220 --> 01:50:13,539 When I first met Scottie, 1241 01:50:14,220 --> 01:50:18,159 he was the only 12-year-old kid I had ever seen who wore ascot. 1242 01:50:19,239 --> 01:50:21,939 Well, it turns out he was going through his Ronald Colman period. 1243 01:50:22,779 --> 01:50:25,180 Come to think of it, he hasn't entirely gotten over it yet. 1244 01:50:25,539 --> 01:50:28,000 Scottie was the world's greatest hypochondriac. 1245 01:50:28,260 --> 01:50:29,800 One night I got a call from him. 1246 01:50:29,939 --> 01:50:32,140 He said he was at the hospital. It was an emergency. 1248 01:50:32,640 --> 01:50:35,479 Anyway, when I got there, he was in a state of panic. 1249 01:50:35,979 --> 01:50:38,119 He told me he had a dent in his chest. 1250 01:50:39,060 --> 01:50:40,260 I walked outside. 1251 01:50:40,399 --> 01:50:43,560 I called in the night watchman, and I asked him if he would open his shirt. 1252 01:50:44,239 --> 01:50:50,700 When he did, I pointed and said, "He has one too." "Everyone has one, Scottie." 01:50:50,939 --> 01:50:56,300 Now, will you get the hell out of here? I couldn't prove it, 01:50:56,539 --> 01:51:02,000 but I always suspected that Scottie went somewhere else for a second opinion. 1253 01:51:04,000 --> 01:51:08,500 He is no longer a hypochondriac, but I love you, Scottie. 1255 01:51:14,300 --> 01:51:18,100 Would being a chip off the old block would not scare you that much. 1256 01:51:19,699 --> 01:51:20,600 I don't know. 1257 01:51:21,000 --> 01:51:22,460 I'm not really sure who you are. 1258 01:51:23,119 --> 01:51:24,899 Out of all the people gathered here today, 1259 01:51:26,000 --> 01:51:29,060 I suppose that I've known Scottie for the shortest amount of time. 1260 01:51:30,760 --> 01:51:32,300 We met in a hospital, 1261 01:51:33,300 --> 01:51:36,199 and I was in for my first operation, and I was pretty scared. 1262 01:51:36,899 --> 01:51:40,279 In walks this man in a doctor's outfit, about two sizes... 01:51:40,899 --> 01:51:45,279 You're a man with absolutely no order of priorities. 1263 01:51:46,439 --> 01:51:48,520 When you split with mom, why didn't you tell me about it? 1264 01:51:48,819 --> 01:51:51,059 - Think hard. I'll come back to you. - I'm going to promise you 01:51:51,259 --> 01:51:54,159 - that I'm going to give you time. - Time? For what? 1266 01:51:54,399 --> 01:51:56,840 It's just that I woke up one morning 1267 01:51:57,020 --> 01:51:58,680 and you had gone. Every responsibility you had to have. 1268 01:51:59,260 --> 01:52:00,920 Well, I'm not going to let you walk away from this. 1269 01:52:00,979 --> 01:52:02,819 - Why do you live with this? - Hell, he's wrong. 1271 01:52:02,859 --> 01:52:04,239 I mean, laughter, rolling around. 1272 01:52:04,359 --> 01:52:05,960 What reason do you give yourself for waking up 01:52:06,159 --> 01:52:07,260 - in the morning? - All nights have fun. 1273 01:52:07,420 --> 01:52:10,039 I mean, what are you doing here besides taking up space? 1274 01:52:10,140 --> 01:52:11,899 Oh, you're doing it. Handle it. 1276 01:52:12,720 --> 01:52:14,899 You're gonna climb into your chicken costume? 1277 01:52:19,680 --> 01:52:21,680 I guess he's had that effect on a lot of people. 1278 01:52:22,479 --> 01:52:25,300 You know, he was always fun to have around the house, 1279 01:52:25,680 --> 01:52:27,199 but during the past months, 1280 01:52:27,460 --> 01:52:30,920 he's shown me that he's got something else going for him. 1281 01:52:31,479 --> 01:52:33,979 That son of a bitch has got the guts of a lion. 1282 01:52:42,819 --> 01:52:45,279 Scottie, come on up here and say hello to your friends. 01:53:51,819 --> 01:53:54,979 I had an aunt once who thought she was a poached egg. 1283 01:53:56,859 --> 01:53:57,720 It's true. 1284 01:54:01,819 --> 01:54:04,340 Well, not all the time, you know. 1285 01:54:05,619 --> 01:54:06,680 Every now and then. 1286 01:54:10,840 --> 01:54:16,819 Yeah, she used to carry around a little brown mat. 1287 01:54:17,260 --> 01:54:18,239 It was her toast. 1288 01:54:29,560 --> 01:54:31,900 She used to sit in the middle of it. 1289 01:54:34,340 --> 01:54:42,000 But nobody was ever allowed to step on her toes. Oh, hey, hey. 1290 01:54:46,700 --> 01:54:57,800 I always felt that that was her way of making sure that no one ever got too close to her. 01:55:03,700 --> 01:55:09,000 Oh. I think I've been carrying around my own little brown mat. 1291 01:55:13,000 --> 01:55:17,000 Look, you-- you-- you're my friends. 1292 01:55:18,000 --> 01:55:25,100 I want you to know that no man could have ever wanted a greater audience. Ever. 1293 01:55:28,500 --> 01:55:29,500 But... 1294 01:55:31,899 --> 01:55:39,960 Actually, I would... I'd like to take this time and have a little chat with my son. 1295 01:55:41,479 --> 01:55:44,000 Which may seem peculiar, but... 1296 01:55:45,000 --> 01:55:50,860 What the hell, I've always been more at ease with large groups. I... 01:55:56,700 --> 01:55:57,760 Jud? 1297 01:56:03,060 --> 01:56:04,000 If you're still here... 1298 01:56:09,000 --> 01:56:10,000 Jud? 1299 01:56:16,400 --> 01:56:20,800 We never knew each other very well, and that's not your fault. 01:56:21,800 --> 01:56:25,000 I just never let anybody know me. 1300 01:56:27,600 --> 01:56:31,300 Anyway, a few months ago, I got the crazy idea that I got. 01:56:31,500 --> 01:56:34,400 I wanted to leave you something, you know, anything. 1301 01:56:35,300 --> 01:56:44,439 And tonight, when I listened, I got it. I realized what I should try to pass on to you, son. 01:56:44,600 --> 01:56:47,039 God, if there's one thing I wish for you, it's passion. 1302 01:56:48,579 --> 01:56:49,500 Passion, Jud. 1303 01:56:50,380 --> 01:56:52,260 For anything, for anybody. 1304 01:56:52,439 --> 01:56:54,920 If it would just go the distance. 1305 01:56:59,159 --> 01:57:01,039 Because I, uh... 1306 01:57:02,859 --> 01:57:07,340 Well, I never had the courage to fail with you. 1307 01:57:09,000 --> 01:57:10,979 I never laid anything on the line. 1308 01:57:16,159 --> 01:57:17,680 God, I missed so much. 1309 01:57:28,600 --> 01:57:32,600 I have a confession to make, you see? Before you're a man with absolutely no finish. So... 01:57:35,900 --> 01:57:36,880 Punchline. 1310 01:57:44,000 --> 01:57:45,000 What? 1311 01:57:49,000 --> 01:57:52,000 I'm not kidding. I don't know how to get off. 1312 01:57:58,500 --> 01:57:59,500 Hello? 1313 01:58:01,000 --> 01:58:04,000 What about that girl you had in Pennsylvania? 1314 01:58:09,700 --> 01:58:11,800 Girl. Who? Jud. 1315 01:58:13,000 --> 01:58:16,300 What about that girl you had in Pennsylvania? 1316 01:58:20,000 --> 01:58:21,000 Eerie? 1317 01:58:21,140 --> 01:58:23,579 Well, I have to admit, she was a little weird. 01:58:29,740 --> 01:58:33,579 And, uh, what about your brother in Alaska? 1318 01:58:35,119 --> 01:58:40,180 - Know? - Know? Of course I know. He's my uncle. 1319 01:58:44,020 --> 01:58:44,859 Okay. 1320 01:58:48,080 --> 01:58:50,339 I'm sorry, I'm not used to the straight lines. 01:58:52,280 --> 01:58:56,939 - Did you put the cat out? - Why? Was he on fire? 1323 01:59:02,960 --> 01:59:04,159 Would you come up here? 1324 01:59:07,520 --> 01:59:08,140 Please. 1325 01:59:20,359 --> 01:59:21,479 Give me a kiss. 1326 01:59:24,239 --> 01:59:25,100 Right here.